Kids

[TreeDog]

How did everyone decide that having kids and raising a family were for them? Currently wrestling with the idea. I would like to start a family, but sometimes feel like I'm a little too late. I also have little experience being around babies or young kids. All of my friends and siblings had kids after I moved across the country so not much exposure. I worry a lot about raising them right and keeping them safe, almost to the point that it scares me away. On the other hand it seems like it would be the best thing in the world and add real meaning to life.

So any thoughts or guidance?

 

[lyingflatlander]

There isn’t a training manual for kids, I had my girls at 42 and 43 years old. Best decisions I ever made.

 

[elkhunterUT]

It is difficult and trying at times raising kids, but there is not anything in this world that is more fulfilling. Make sure you commit to being a part of their lives and the relationships you form will make you a better person.

Also, hunting with kids is about the best thing in the world in my opinion. I have killed some great animals in my hunting career. All pale in comparison to the experiences I have had with my 3 kids taking deer, elk, antelope, etc. Just doesn't get any better!!

 

[CorbLand]

Like you, I dont have kids and worry about raising them. I am the youngest in my family and have little to no experience with little ones.

How do you do it? I dont know but people have figured it out for a long time. Kids are durable.

 

[william schmaltz]

None of us parents know what the hell we’re doing. Especially us Dads.

You will never have the opportunity in life to have the quality of relationship as you could have potentially with your child. Having a child is the point in life when you finally truly love something more than yourself; and man does it open your eyes. It finally all comes together when you can look at your child and think “wait, my Heavenly Father loves me THIS much?!?!” It’s just crazy.

I’ve lived through some true tragedy when it comes to my own children and I wouldn’t change my decision knowing the results. I’d trade everything for my kids.

 

[BFR]

Had my daughters when in my 30s. I made sure they were included in all my hunting vacations and made sure we also had “kid” vacations, Disneyland, trips to places wanted to go. When they were older and did school activities, 4H etc I made time for those. I’ve done the same with my grandkids. Worked a lot of overtime to be able to afford it and don’t regret it at all.

 

[Choupique]

Mine are still young, but so far man I couldn't imagine life without em.

I'm a better person for it. My wife and I always talk about how we've basically forgotten what life was like before kids.

 

[willtim]

It will be the greatest thing you ever did.

 

[Rich M]

I waited too long and regret it.

Just do it, you’ll figure it out.

 

[Customweld]

As stated above, they don't come with an owners manual, but you put your head down and muddle your way through it. My 3 girls are grown and moved away, those 18 years with them flew by. I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.

 

[EastHumboldt]

I was very young. 18. I don’t recommend it, but my son is the most important thing I ever did in life. He went through some wild dangerous crap in his early 20’s. Now he’s 46. We’re best friends. Nobody id rather go hunting or fishing with.

 

[JFK]

Most people have zero experience really caring for kids before they decide to have them. I know I didn’t. First diaper I ever changed was in the hospital after our first was born, and I had to be shown how to do it by a nurse. I also didn’t really care for other people’s kids before having our own. Not that I hated them…just preferred to be around adults because I couldn’t relate with kids. Now we have two of my own, 5 and 1, and can say that part of me has changed (for the better) because I understand them now. Taking my oldest fishing is about as good as it gets in life. Concern about the future, occasional self doubt about your parenting etc is totally normal.

That said…it’s a real commitment. Probably the biggest one you can make in life. You can have meaning in life without having kids. If there is something that is lacking, don’t expect kids to fix it. They do add stress, and life changes immeasurably after their arrival.

 

[kwackkillncrew]

it doesnt matter if you have been around other kids/babies or not. I was super awkward holding my niece and you can tell from the photos. We had our daughter 4 years ago and it has been awesome. Sure there are tough times when you dont know if you doing things right, but if you are thinking about it and questioning what you are doing you are probably doing just fine. Fishing, hunting, outdoor activities are much more enjoyable with a kid because you are watching them witness alot of things for the first time and it brings back alot of memories when i was a kid and my parents were teaching me. We only had one kid and sure you cant be quite as ambitious with your outings for the first few years but you can still do plenty of things. Throw the kid in a back pack and get after it!

 

[coloyooper]

First was a surprise. The other two were more intentional. Kids rock- wouldn’t change a thing about it!

 

[Traveler]

This might have been implied but what does your significant other think about it?

 

[WrstMuleHntr]

My Grandmother once told me that if you wait until you are ready, then you will never have kids.

As long as you are committed to be a father for life, then don't wait. Lean as you go like the rest of us.

Do you have a wife that wants children as well? Kind of an important part of the equation.

 

[BadEarth]

When your 2 year old runs as hard as they can to give you a hug when you get them from daycare you’ll wonder how you ever debated it. It’s a love like no other

 

[Choupique]

Or the experience of seeing them again after 10 days in the mountains or off on a 2 week work trip. Nothing in life compares.

 

[Blacktocomm]

We just had our first kid 2 years ago - and he is a handful. A few health issues and he's not a sleeper. My wife quit her job due to the issues and he is costing us a significant amount of money that way so it is very tough.

I can give you 10,000 words on how difficult it is to have a kid, but there are no words to explain how beautiful it can be too.

Plus - hiking with a kid in a backpack is great hunting season preparation.

 

[ODB]

you cannot prepare. you either do it or you don't. and only those who do, know what its like