Am I a jerk? (Read before voting)

Am I a huge jerk???

  • Yes

    Votes: 375 83.0%
  • No

    Votes: 77 17.0%

  • Total voters
    452
Joined
Sep 20, 2021
Messages
13
I just can’t imagine putting these ridiculous bounds on my child’s first deer. Let the laws and regulations do that. Think about it, if you shoot the “biggun” and look at it on the wall for the rest of your life, are you going to be happy? Or are you going to be reminded that “you know, that could have been my kid’s first deer but I WANTED IT.” Moreover, will your kid ever want to go hunting with you again? All they’ll think is “dad always gets to shoot the big ones. I have to work my way up to that.”

Instead of looking at it like a “I put the time in so it’s mine,” look at it as “Input the time in and WE got (kid’s name) a great deer!” Think of all the positive memories you’ll have from that, rather than shooting it for your own validation.

There, I’m done being a troll. Dude wanted my opinion and I gave it, he doesn’t have to like it or hear it.
Maybe a small twist as we get further off topic but I would dare to bet if this father son team saw a big deer area and began activity hunting it, helped dad put up stands, help dad decide where what when why etc. he would be more than happy and proud to let his son shoot the deer. I can only assume by the context of his post that it’s more of a random chance that a toad shows up.
 

def90

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Joined
Aug 12, 2020
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So here's the deal last year was my son's first year to be able to shoot a deer, this year is his second year and he's pumped.

However my mother and father think I am a monster. . . All because I have a couple of rules for him.

Rule #1 no small mulie bucks (our mulie population is low and Forky's are dumber than a box of rocks, let them grow)

#2 until your old enough to sit alone Dad (me) is shooting anything Bigger than what I already have at home!

That's it, those are the only rules. My son is perfectly ok with this because he knows most years I'm not shooting a deer and he's going to get to shoot two bucks and a few does. He also knows in a few more years he will sit by himself and shoot whatever he wants. Basically I don't want to spoil the poor kid if some monster walks out, and I've put in my time and all the work for these spots I deserve a little something right? So let me have it am I jerk if I shoot a trophy buck in front of my kid when he's holding a tag?

For reference his white tail range is doe to about 150 inch deer and his mulie range is mature buck up to 170inch class.

I don’t get it.. can’t shoot a forky because populations are low but he can still shoot 2 bucks and a few does?
 
OP
S
Joined
Jan 16, 2018
Messages
1,034
I don’t get it.. can’t shoot a forky because populations are low but he can still shoot 2 bucks and a few does?

Different species, only allowed 1 mule deer buck no does. That tag Is also able to be used on a whitetail of either sex, and another tag is available for a white tail of either sex. . . And you can buy as many antlerless whitetail tags as your heart desires.

Mule deer population is lower, white tail population is quite high. The Forky restriction is on Mulies only as there are less of them around and it's kind of like shooting a cow, they just stand there and look at you.
 

Rich M

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Jun 14, 2017
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Orlando
You have him sit w you and you will shoot the big buck that shows up. LOL!

If you don't get more joy and pride out of your kid doing something than you doing it yourself, can't help you there.
 
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KID

FNG
Joined
Sep 13, 2021
Messages
53
Do whatever keeps him engaged and wanting to keep hunting. Also, maybe think about paying it forward so that when you are too old to get out by yourself he makes sure you still go out with him. He’ll be off on his own before you know it. Think about the memories you want him to have of hunting with his dad and go from there.
I can relate to this exactly. It's funny how I've been able to now teach my dad some new tricks and put him on some great deer and also a spike elk here in the recent 10 yrs. Its very gratifying to be able to pay the effort back to someone who went out of his way for me. I look forward to this same experience with my son someday!
 
Joined
May 22, 2014
Messages
1,339
I can see not wanting him to shoot a small fork horn buck, but to tell him he cant shoot a big one could very well sour him on hunting if you shoot it out from underneath him. Do you want to risk him getting out of hunting over you wanting to shoot a big buck. For me its always way more fun to see someone who is new to hunting kill an animal.
 

IdahoElk

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Oct 30, 2014
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I would be thrilled if I had a child that was in a stand with me and shot a monster because of me, you’re instantly the worlds best dad.
 
Joined
Jul 21, 2019
Messages
521
Location
Texas
Jerk is too strong a word. He could have worded it: “Am I being selfish”

He mentions kids being “ruined” because they killed a really big one when they were young. That may happen, but I think it is prettyDF98759C-9C6D-48C9-AF6F-456F2597B2AE.jpeg rare.

What I have seen is kids get pushed aside. Instead of the hunt being about the kid getting a deer, if the conditions are not perfect, the Dad goes ahead and shoots. Too far, short time to shoot, animal moving…….Kid learns Dad is out for himself first, and kid loses interest in hunting. I have seen that quite a few times


On the flip-side, I have some friends in Alaska. He has 3 sons and has brought each one down to my ranch in Texas to hunt their first deer as they came of age. The hunt was solely about the son. Dad would not have considered shooting even though they had some big critters come out in front of them. End result: Dad is ecstatic and kid is ecstatic.

My bottom line: if I take a kid hunting, and he has a tag, the hunt is his. I will have plenty of hunts that are just me, but only a few precious buddy hunts.
 
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OP
S
Joined
Jan 16, 2018
Messages
1,034
Oh and that forky even though stupid to you might be his biggest and best memory with you, time is promised to no one.

There are 9 pages so I understand not going through all of them and I appreciate the sentiment you're expressing. He is allowed to shoot a Forky whitetail of which there are 4 or 5 for every 1 Forky mule deer. And he harvested a medium sized 5x5 whitetail as his second buck last year so Forkys are pretty safe regardless of species now.

Thanks for commenting, I appreciate the rsponse
 

hunterjmj

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Feb 3, 2019
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My wife killed her first antelope this year with me by her side. It was one of the greatest memories I have. I had buck fever and I wasn't even shooting. No way in hell I would selfishly take opportunity from her or my kids. We only get so many times hunting together and I want great memories and no regrets. Maybe this is a consequence of social media or you're just an a-hole.
 
Joined
Jun 27, 2019
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The Boot
On their first one, Id just make sure it was legal. But If im sitting there with my boys and a monster comes along and Im confident they could make the shot, I dont care about what I have on the wall at home. Dont take a memory from them.

Its just not a good look to say Ill take the good one and you can have whats left over. I think long term that buck will be on your wall and youll know every time you look at it that you shouldve let your son take the shot. It would be like Poe's Telltale Heart for me. I dont know. It just doesnt sit right with me. Seems like if you have your son with you, its him first. Youll have plenty of opportunites hunting on your own.

Im definitely not right about everything and Im learning this parenting thing like everyone else. This just seems an easy one for me.
 

Ralphie

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Joined
Feb 18, 2019
Messages
385
I read the OPs first post but nothing else. I could see not shooting forkies. Although I can understand a kid shooting one it drives me crazy when I see grown adults shooting young mule deer.
The not allowing him to shoot a bigger deer than what you have does seem pretty dang selfish.
 
Joined
Sep 22, 2013
Messages
6,389
A good father's greatest joy is seeing his kid excel and experience a moment of pure appreciation and success. I was tough on my daughter when teaching her how to fish, made he learn to use very light line and develop the skills to land bigger fish with ultralite gear. She went on to win tournaments year after year. Raising the bar is good for kids but maximizing their opportunity to leap over it is equally important. Good parents don't place themselves first...your child gets that position. Anything less makes you less of a parent.

BTW...when my daughter won jackpots she always gave it to the crew as a tip. That impressed everyone on board and made me very proud as a parent. it was not unusual for her to ask the deckies to place her fish in the bait tank for release after the weigh-in. She preferred CPR for bass (Catch-Photograph-Release) and other dads would even ask if they could have her fish. She's smile and say no...I don't kill calico bass. She caught two good sized halibut on one trip fishing with 6lb test (a real feat) and both were stolen out of the net by a sealion, she wasn't at all upset. That was really amazing to me. Seeing your kids excel at anything should be the goal. Those are the things they will remember when deciding whether to bring you home or drop you at hospice.
 

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