Am I a jerk? (Read before voting)

Am I a huge jerk???

  • Yes

    Votes: 375 83.0%
  • No

    Votes: 77 17.0%

  • Total voters
    452

LightFoot

WKR
Joined
Feb 21, 2016
Messages
1,449
Location
Texas & Alaska
So here's the deal last year was my son's first year to be able to shoot a deer, this year is his second year and he's pumped.

However my mother and father think I am a monster. . . All because I have a couple of rules for him.

Rule #1 no small mulie bucks (our mulie population is low and Forky's are dumber than a box of rocks, let them grow)

#2 until your old enough to sit alone Dad (me) is shooting anything Bigger than what I already have at home!

That's it, those are the only rules. My son is perfectly ok with this because he knows most years I'm not shooting a deer and he's going to get to shoot two bucks and a few does. He also knows in a few more years he will sit by himself and shoot whatever he wants. Basically I don't want to spoil the poor kid if some monster walks out, and I've put in my time and all the work for these spots I deserve a little something right? So let me have it am I jerk if I shoot a trophy buck in front of my kid when he's holding a tag?

For reference his white tail range is doe to about 150 inch deer and his mulie range is mature buck up to 170inch class.
After over 200 comments, not sure I can add anything but I will ask a question...

Why is it so important that he not 1-up you and don't you what success for your kid beyond your own?

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OP
S
Joined
Jan 16, 2018
Messages
1,034
After over 200 comments, not sure I can add anything but I will ask a question...

Why is it so important that he not 1-up you and don't you what success for your kid beyond your own?

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I guess I would ask have you read through the comments?

I'm Not concerned about him not one 1-uping me. I want to make sure he stays actively engaged and doesn't lose interest if he were to harvest a very large dear early on. Interestingly today I spoke with a retired game Warden that is hunting the neighboring property, as we were talking about kids hunting I mentioned the no fork horn rule as I hadn't met this person. He response was " good rule and there are plenty of whitetail bucks to find one for a kid or anyone" he followed it by stating "the worst thing you can do for you kids is take them out and let them shoot a really good buck early on, I've watched lots of friends and acquaintances do this and lots of those kids lost interest because all the deer they saw after that were "too small""

So I guess my concern is somewhat founded. But I can see things both ways.
 
OP
S
Joined
Jan 16, 2018
Messages
1,034
2021 season so far.

Son shot 2 bucks before 10 am of opening dayScreenshot_20211113-210032.pngScreenshot_20211113-210140.png
The Muley was a no brainer and was taken about 10 minutes after shooting time (agonizing minutes as we waited to see if he could come our way from the neighbors or go away from us)

Screenshot_20211113-210353.png
Son watched the whitetail buck for about 8 min before deciding to take him. He asked me about 4 times if I though he should pass on him and I kept telling him it was 100% his choice.

Haven't taped the mulie yet but I'm guessing him around 150-155 but good mass throughout and some great character.
 

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LightFoot

WKR
Joined
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I guess I would ask have you read through the comments?

I'm Not concerned about him not one 1-uping me. I want to make sure he stays actively engaged and doesn't lose interest if he were to harvest a very large dear early on. Interestingly today I spoke with a retired game Warden that is hunting the neighboring property, as we were talking about kids hunting I mentioned the no fork horn rule as I hadn't met this person. He response was " good rule and there are plenty of whitetail bucks to find one for a kid or anyone" he followed it by stating "the worst thing you can do for you kids is take them out and let them shoot a really good buck early on, I've watched lots of friends and acquaintances do this and lots of those kids lost interest because all the deer they saw after that were "too small""

So I guess my concern is somewhat founded. But I can see things both ways.
Sounds like you weren't really asking, just seeking validation.

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Joined
Apr 17, 2017
Messages
14
Location
CA
If bucks are plentiful, I would encourage him to pass up the smaller bucks to teach patience. However, I do not agree with you solely getting a crack at the big buck. Either flip a coin or go odd - even outings to see who gets first shot at he big one. That way he is rewarded with a chance at shooting a big buck.
 

woods89

WKR
Joined
Sep 3, 2014
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Southern MO Ozarks
Interesting thread.

I think kids are more resilient than people think, and I don't think a few unique rules in whatever hobby they and their parents enjoy is going to ruin it for them. Life has a lot of rules we don't always understand, and if you want to stay employed and out of jail you kind of have to get used to that.

Good luck, OP.
 
Joined
Oct 16, 2021
Messages
46
Do yourself a favor and let your wife make the choices from now on. You . Meh .not so much. My son has a few more years until he can hunt but to hell if I'm gonna tell him he can't shoot a legal deer or elk. The only rules I have set in the woods for the family while we are out. Is safety safety safety.
 
Joined
May 13, 2015
Messages
3,911
Do yourself a favor and let your wife make the choices from now on. You . Meh .not so much. My son has a few more years until he can hunt but to hell if I'm gonna tell him he can't shoot a legal deer or elk. The only rules I have set in the woods for the family while we are out. Is safety safety safety.
I bet your going to get him a participation trophy too, right?
 
Joined
Nov 17, 2019
Messages
50
Location
Western pa
Which would make you feel better, watching your son take a buck larger than you ever have, or you taking a larger buck than you ever have?
This is also my sons first year and he gets first whack at anything we see. I may be disappointed to miss out on a giant, but im waaay more excited to see him take one.
As far as the leg work goes, i have taken him along for scouting, hanging stands, got him to reload some, all the stuff that i want him to learn anyway and i figure he has as much a stake as i do.
 
Joined
Jan 23, 2020
Messages
30
This reminds me of a story…

A buddy and I were digging fence posts with one of those dumb hand diggers…definitely hard work in hard soil…but we were making it work.

As the day went on we would occasionally look down and ask “Deep enough?”…then measure and obviously it wasn’t deep enough…so we kept digging. “Deep enough” became an inside joke…

Point is I learned two important lessons:

1) Rent an auger next time…would have been money well spent.

2) If you have to ask… 😂
 

TxxAgg

WKR
Joined
Dec 27, 2019
Messages
2,147
Whole lotta people here should feel dumb when they see the OP's newest thread from a couple days ago
 
Joined
Dec 24, 2021
Messages
11
I'd let him shoot what he likes/sees at first, but then add similar rules after his first. I wouldn't say you're a monster, but i would always let my son shoot the bigger deer if i had that opportunity. That joy on their face is priceless every time.
 

Lane579

FNG
Joined
Dec 20, 2020
Messages
18
Honestly didn’t read all 12 pages but the votes speak for themselves. Maybe it’s just me, I enjoy seeing my children be successful more than being successful myself. I’d much rather watch my son shoot a monster than brag about the monster I got. Two things will happen: He’ll not enjoy hunting and quit; or, when he’s old enough he’ll just not enjoy hunting with you, which may be even worse (for you anyway).
 

npm352

WKR
Joined
Apr 18, 2018
Messages
468
Not sure if you're a jerk or not, but you are drastically reducing the chances of your son becoming a lifelong hunting partner which is pretty sad.

Unless you are on the Matt Rinella train purposely trying to reduce a hunter from the ranks so you can shoot bigger deer on less-crowded public land, in which case, nice work.
 
Joined
Jun 17, 2016
Messages
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ID
My rules for my son are work hard, don't complain, help with field dressing, help with pack out, and help with processing once we get home. We both agree no road hunting, boots on ground only, and get away from the roads. I let him make most of the calls when we are in the field. I avoid hunting the same species at the same time so I can focus on him and his development. When he hunts I'm there to support/mentor him and enjoy the time together. I don't override his ideas unless they are grossly futile or unsafe. My goal is when he's 18, he will have had 7 seasons under his belt, and he will be able to go solo due to years of experience. BUT..hopefully he still wants dad to tag along.
 

EastMT

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Joined
Dec 19, 2016
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Eastern Montana
There is nothing wrong with not shooting young ones if the population is down, conservation lesson and good explanation of why.

As far as the I’m shooting the biggest one, personably I’d be more excited to see my boy get one bigger than me, so I’d want him to shoot. In the end excitement in a kids eyes is higher on my list than horns.
 

Aces11

Lil-Rokslider
Joined
Dec 19, 2018
Messages
134
Location
North Dakota
I didn’t read all comments. Depends how on the situation as far as making him wait for a mature deer. If deer are plentiful and you know he won’t mind passing a few, then you can help him pick out a mature one. If he’s impatient and wants to shoot whatever I would let him.

If a giant came by I would certainly let my son take it over me. Agree with Coop, I would be a lot more excited for my kid to shoot a big one than myself. My buddy recently let his son shoot a bigger whitetail with his bow then he has ever shot. My buddy could have sat and shot that buck. They called me that night very excited. Guessing they will remember that experience together a lot longer than if my buddy would have shot it.

Looks like it worked out well for you and your son! Congratulations to you both!
 
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