Common hunting colloquialisms

[bullnose]

You have kind hair - kind of hair that grows on a dog's ***
If he ever had an original idea, it died of loneliness
That would be like throwing a hot dog down a hallway
Never put in anything in your mouth you can't lift above your waist
You look like a soup sandwich
You're about as useful as football bat
If I had a dog that looked like you I'd shave his *** and teach him to walk backwards
He's got a a Roman nose... roamin' all over his face
Were all your kids conceived while standing? Because I'll ever seen you do is **** up

Those are just a few a remember from my time in the Navy and 40+ years of Michigan deer camps...

 

[Zeke6951]

I could send you somewhere to screw up and you would screw up before you got there.

I am so honest if I tell you a hen dips snuff you can look under her wing and find a tooth brush.

You have come to a goat house looking for wool.

You are so dumb you couldn't pore pee out of a boot with the instruction wrote on the heel.

 

[FlyGuy]

I could send you somewhere to screw up and you would screw up before you got there.

I am so honest if I tell you a hen dips snuff you can look under her wing and find a tooth brush.

You have come to a goat house looking for wool.

You are so dumb you couldn't pore pee out of a boot with the instruction wrote on the heel.

Those are good!


“What is man without the beasts? If all the beasts were gone, man would die from a great loneliness of spirit.“

Chief Seattle

 

[AK_Skeeter]

two words my hunting partner used quite often:
Sweatequity and Siwash

Sweatequtiy as in hard work to get away from competition... hunting where most folks will not
or can not go.

Siwash is spending the night without a shelter. Sometimes necessary if an animal is shot
late in the day miles away from camp.

 

[Buckhunter1955]

He doesn't know shit from burnt tar.
It's raining harder than a double cunted cow pissing on a flat rock.
If you don't use you head you'll have to use your feet.
Hotter than a whore's ass on a Saturday night.
I'm so broke I can't pay attention.
Colder than a landlords heart.
If your going to ride it, fly it, or f--k it, rent it!
Tighter than a Nuns c--t.
Sweating like Obama at election.
Dumb as a post.
That's gonna go over like a turd in a punch bowl.
Hard as a wedding dick.
Smooth as a prom queens thighs.
F--k, fight, or hold the light.
Ugly as a mud fence.
Crooked as a dogs hind leg.
He doesn't know if he's afoot or horseback.

 

[49ereric]

Horn soup is mighty thin
red it‘s dead brown it‘s down (deer)
colder than a witches tit
colder than a grave diggers ass

 

[Elkslayer67]

“ Hotter than a freshly molested rat in a wool sock”

 

[EastHumboldt]

Well I gotta drop the kids off at the pool.

heard this one from my son who was in an airborne unit. Better go… I got a jumper in the door.

He took off outta there like a raped ape.

dumb as a doornail

He was at the end of the line when they were passing out brains.

He couldn’t find his own ass with both hands in broad daylight.

Couldnt hit the broad side of a barn

That one is a legend in his own mind.

 

[isocyanate]

If you’re working hard (or need to give the appearance):
Bowed up like a cutworm
Bowed up like a Halloween cat

 

[Murdy]

If you could harness the brain power in here,, you could toast some bread.

 

[Blacky]

The only time the sights have to be on the target is when the gun goes off.

 

[EdP]

One I don't like: "He didn't go x yards." When he DID go x yards.

 

[Trevor96]

Like a bull in a china shop

 

[TheGDog]

Slight variation...

"Colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra"

I always heard ... Colder than a witches tit in an Iron bra

 

[74Bronco]

When its really windy.

Blowing like a queer on a troop train.

 

[Yarak]

Are you debating on which end of that turd is the clean end so you can pick it up
You need to piss or get away from the pot

These two are referring to someone needing to make a decision

 

[PorterNY]

-When you’ve had a bad day..
“Other than that , how was the play mr lincoln?”

- when someone falls asleep or passes out
“Down goes frasier “

- when someone shoots a spike
“Tug hill 11 point”

- advice on judgement
“ don’t take any wooden nickels”

- on someone lack of smarts
“ it take her an hour and a half to watch 60 minutes “

- on someone’s appearance
“ looks like they ran a 100 yard dash in a 60 yard gym”

- from the farm
“ corn don’t grow in the bag”
“ tire is only flat on the bottom “

- when going on a date
“ get to it and do it , so you can get to bed and work in the morning “

- when asking how long a drive it is?
“ about 3 beers…..

- how’s the weather?
“ I can still see the mail box , so not bad

 

[rlmmarine]

Shits getting deep in here its time to put my hip wadders on

My dads saying when someone was doing something stupid
"F..k" up a wet dream

 

[grainhog]

"That little truck will climb a tree if you can hang on"

"It's raining like a two-****** cow pissing on a flat rock"

"It's hotter than two rats f****** in a wool sock out here"

Calling buffaloes bufflers and mountain lions painters

Calling big trees pickles or hooter pigs

 

[Northernpiker]

From an old high school buddy who got in a few fisticuffs.
I ain’t Bad but when the Bads around they call me Boss.
There’s only 3 Badasses in the world...I get Christmas cards from 2 of them.
When I was fishing with my Dad and a storm approaching.
That looks like it could be a Frog Strangler.