Career vs Hobbies - how to balance them

rharbaugh

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Apr 26, 2021
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E. Iowa
My Dad sent me this today image today and it's something that I've been curious about for some time. How do you all handle the internal push-and-pull of pursuing a "better" career vs. choosing more time with friends/family/hobbies?

Part of me thinks: chase the career, more money, more and better toys, and satisfying my personal ambition of being "successful". But that comes with the costs we associate with work (more hours on the the jobs, other's people BS, climbing the corporate ladder).

Other thoughts are: do what's necessary to pay the mortgage, feed and clothe the kids, cover expenses, and gauge my "success" based on time spent in the woods.

Just to clarify, I really enjoy my career right now so don't think I'm complaining. I have at least another 25-30 years of working, so just looking to hear from others how they waged this over their years.

Thanks,

RH


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Joined
Sep 23, 2016
Messages
932
My career success will mean nothing after I'm dead. No U-hauls behind hearses. Toys mean nothing, money in a certain sense means nothing (obviously need enough to live), family is everything.

"we spend our entire lives working jobs we don't like, to make money we don't need, to buy things we can't afford, to impress people we don't like".....

Nothing wrong with having fun but I'd rather own nothing than have things own me....

My personal & spiritual life are another matter.
 

Breddoch

Lil-Rokslider
Joined
May 30, 2018
Messages
154
Cast but a glance at riches, and they are gone, for they will surely sprout wings and fly off to the sky like an eagle.

Proverbs 23:5

My worst career decisions/mistakes were when I focused on the money. A wise man once told me, “beware of mercenary acts”.
 

jpmulk

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Nov 12, 2021
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God, family, then work. Of course the bills must be paid. But i believe any time a decision is made only for the money, it is typically the wrong decision. Another aspect that i believe is important to consider is are you being called to something specific. This would be from a spiritual perspective. You might have gifts and skills God can use in specific ways. Just my ramblings.

Great question! One ive wrestled with many times as well.
 

CorbLand

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Mar 16, 2016
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There is no right or wrong way to look at it. You have to decide what you want.

I have an uncle that worked ~15 years of his life away to build what he has now. He is a multimillionaire and can do what ever when ever he wants. He is 45 and pretty much has the rest of life on cruise control so to speak.

My brother is a year into his own CPA firm. He quit the firm he was working at to start his own so he could take on enough clients to work 9-5 and pay bills.

Decide what you want and get after it. My goal is to make enough money to live comfortably, have reliable vehicles, a decent house and a side by side. I plan to achieve this by working a job that pays me enough to have it but requires the least amount of work/time as possible to achieve it.
 
Joined
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Some men dream of doing so much in retirement, travel, dream hunts ... and they don't live till retirement or die shortly thereafter without having enjoyed those things they desired. Personally, I put my family ahead of promotions and was able to devote more time to them and to those things I love to some extent. Been retired 5 yrs so I have already cheated the man and feel lucky.
 

EdP

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For the most part I liked my work and I worked hard to get ahead. That meant getting promotions, and making more money, but money was never what it was all about. A major driver was that I was going to have to work to support myself and my family and I wanted the company I worked for to do well. I was self motivated and didn't always like the decisions made by my management so I tried to get to higher positions in order to make decisions I felt were better. My efforts got me into middle management and brought more money, enough that I retired comfortably over 11 years ago just after turning 56. During my working years I rarely felt that I was working too much and didn't have enough time for family or self, but there were periods of that. My coworkers at lower levels were working the same long hours during those same periods and were making less money doing it. Sure, there were things I missed but there were also a lot of things we did together. Some of them we could not have done without the salary I earned. All in all, I'm pretty happy with how it turned out.
 

rclouse79

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Dec 10, 2019
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Getting philosophical, I like it. As a high school physics teacher I am not a fan of other teachers who complain about pay. Teachers who went into this job planning to become rich are idiots who probably do not deserve their current paycheck. A while back I added up the number of school days I work during the year. If I were to take the amount of money I make per work day and multiply it by 365 days I still wouldn't be rich, but would compare to a lot of other jobs most people consider to be "better" or "higher paying". I wouldn't trade my time off for the extra money I could make.
My dad was an optometrist who made a comfortable living. I feel like he had a good work-life balance and still had money put away for retirement. At 60 years old he was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's and didn't live to see his 70th birthday.
Life is all about balance, and my wife and I are trying to be responsible with our finances. That being said, my dad is a good reminder for me to enjoy the time and blessings I have now because there is no guarantee for tomorrow.
 

GSPHUNTER

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Jun 30, 2020
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I am fortunate that I had a career that provided both a comfortable living and allowed me to take enough time off to spend time with family and friends doing the things we enjoyed, and wind down from work related stress, not that that was ever a real issue for me. My wife and me both turned down better paying position at work because those position would have taken away from family and vacation time. We are retired now and live a very comfortable life doing the things we enjoy.
 

BluMtn

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When I had my so called 8-5 jobs after getting out of farming I would tell my employers during the interview that my family comes first and when I want or need to do something with and for them I will. If that is going to be a problem with working for you I need to know now so as not to waste either of our time. Was never turned down for a job.
 
Joined
May 13, 2015
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As pointed out above, there are at least 2 different ways to view this and go about it in a reasonably balanced way. 1). the earn it quickly and grow it into real wealth while still young and able to enjoy it. and 2). find a good career that provides a comfortable life. There are pitfalls in both.

I eventually chose #2. I am in the Education field. I make a comfortable wage, have a decent retirement, medical, dental and vision benefits; I work 195 days out of the school year (a year but not a calendar year). Not the only reason, but one reason I chose a career in education, is the time off. Unfortunately the time off is not during the hunting season, but I do have time to enjoy life, travel a bit... However, I am far from rich and seriously doubt I ever will be.

Education has been a bit fickle in some respects. I mean, there is the political environment to navigate, at least until you are established, but in education, the political atmosphere is in almost constant flux. Every organization has it's clicks, has those that need to be in charge (with and without the skills, knowledge and abilities to do so), those that are easily intimidated and then work against you, because they are afraid you might take their job, or end up working for you, and the list goes on and on.

From my experience in life, in what I consider the 2 most important fields, medicine and education, what I see is a significant percentage that get comfortable and at some point in their career, just want to cruise along until retirement. For many industries, this may not be a big issue. But in education and medicine, the lack of taking professional development seriously has huge impacts on those we serve. In short, whatever career path you chose, my advice is too not let yourself become irrelevant; it is the fast track to premature retirement.
 
Joined
Feb 12, 2022
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Personal life is hands down the top priority.

Wife/hobbies/etc...

Work is to support everything else.

I have a pretty successful business, doing what I enjoy. Wife has a good career she enjoys. We do fairly well.

But our focus is definitely not on building wealth.
 

thinhorn_AK

"DADDY"
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Jul 2, 2016
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Alaska
I struggle with this constantly. I initially set out to get into a career that would allow me the time off and the money to do what I wanted for fun. I have done well in that regard, I never have to do overtime, I never work evenings, weekends and I get around 4 months off a year. I also get paid quite well for the amount of time I put in at work.

That part is nice but I am often unmotivated at work and not excited or stimulated by my work. Sometimes that is okay because I have no desire to be somebody who is obsessed with their job (I grew up around those people and saw the regret they had when they got older). I sort of wish there was something more I could do. Luckily I'm finishing my advanced degrees which will open up a lot more doors for me.

The problem is that I know 100% than once I move up into a different position and use that masters degree, I will instantly wish I had my time off like I did before, but then I'll be trapped by the money. I hear this all the time from people in my field. They tell me they wish they had known how good they had it before getting into the upper management type stuff. No that they are there, they simply can't take a pay cut to go back and they have far more stress and less time off.

It is sort of like I have a devil and an angel on my shoulders, my mom would be horrified to learn I had the potential to work more (and earn more) but didn't use it. My dad would be happy that I was putting my free time first before work.

I don't have an answer but I think about this a lot.
 

Mt Al

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Montana
Learning a lot by reading these replies.

Here's another/supportive 2 cents: For work, find out what your God-given talents and gifts are and find work that matches with that. Then, let work take care of itself. A huge part of life is work, no matter how you slice it. If you're in a job that matches your skills, you're happier and your time off with family is better.

People who are naturally entrepreneurial trying to live an 8 - 5 job to focus on family are often miserable. Similarly, 'government' workers who are perfectly happy but think they'll be better off starting a new company are often miserable. There's no single way to address making a living, but doing a personality test to find out how your brain works and matching a job to that has huge potential upside.

Also, be nice to yourself because you will make many and maybe huge mistakes along with way - because you're human and everyone else does, too.

I'm at the age where friends who worked in companies or government jobs with pensions are retiring. They'll have income and benefits their whole lives. I chose a different route and have zero regrets.
 

Biggie

FNG
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Dec 17, 2020
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Kansas
I'll take a flexible job that pays the bills and allows me time off whenever over one that allows me to retire 5-10 years earlier any day. Take the time to hunt while you're able bodied, who knows what life will throw at you when you're 60+.
 

5MilesBack

"DADDY"
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Feb 27, 2012
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Early on in my life I was all about working.......I literally wanted to be married to my career and a servant to "self". Eventually that waned and my career goals completely flipped places with my family and life goals. Now I'm a servant of God in everything I do and in all my pursuits. Stress is low and joy and peace are high.

"And whatsoever ye do, do it heartily, as to the Lord, and not unto men; Knowing that of the Lord ye shall receive the reward of the inheritance: for ye serve the Lord Christ."
 
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