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If I were the OP, I'd take whatever StuckInTheEast's opinion on all things automotive to heart. He has provided solid advice to many on this forum and his capacity to speak from personal experience is likely unparalleled here.Your wife's friends are right. They seem great till they break, which everything does. Poor parts support and expensive to repair. That is especially true on major components...engines, transmissions, transfer case, differentials.
The newer direct injection 5.6L had issues with cylinder wall scoring and severe piston slap and metal contamination in the oil. Seem to mostly effect cold climate vehicles, so don't buy a used Canadian market truck or one out of northern US.
Last long block I put together in one was near $18k out the door, he was happy he bought the good warranty.
Nissan truck market share is tiny compared to others. Id run away from one even for a good price personally. Especially the diesel option, good luck finding anything for them or anyone to work on them if you cant youself. Nissan uses 3bolts where 1 would do the trick, I hate working on them personally, second only to European trash.
As for what to buy? New whatever with extended warranty or well looked over used whatever other than Nissan...with best add on warranty you can find. Its all a roll of the dice anymore. Best of luck.
If I were the OP, I'd take whatever StuckInTheEast's opinion on all things automotive to heart. He has provided solid advice to many on this forum and his capacity to speak from personal experience is likely unparalleled here.