Wrestling a Grizz to the death

KHNC

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So , I have a question. If we encounter a Grizz on our elk hunt next month, what is the best strategy. I will have my chest rig handgun of course. But , from what ive heard, i will be lucky to get one or two shots off before the bear gets on top of me. I know a little jitz from watching UFC for many years. Should I try a triangle choke? Maybe keep in my guard for a minute until I can get my knife out and stab im in the gizzard? How about just carrying a bigger knife and charge the bear like brad pitt at the end of Legends of The Fall? You think it would just run off from the shock of me charging it? Or would it just be better to spray myself with bear spray and hope it doesnt like the taste of it on my body? This is a serious inquiry. I want to be prepared.
 
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I think one can wax poetic about the 'best' approach, but I would prefer to go with the 'tried and true.'

Your best bet is to put your dominant index and middle fingers in the bears nostrils until he asphyxiates and loses consciousness. An equally effective but more controversial approach is to shove your dominant hand down the bears throat and grab its tongue by the base. Best case you can rip it lose and he will bleed out quickly. Worst case he gags and only takes your hand.
 

Gerbdog

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Always carry a bit of rope in your pack.... you can try to lasso it, and perhaps break it with some extensive training. Then toss some saddle bags on it and have it carry your elk kill out of the mountains. Best use of grizzly attack for sure. Bonus points if you can ride it along with the elk meat on its back.
 
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For context, my ancestors, when new to this country, spent a lot of time in the grizz woods, and we have a strong family history of conflict with ursus horibilus. We didn't come to the nose plunge or the tongue torque through innovation, it was a pure numbers game, and my family tree would be quite a bit broader had we not lost so many trying other defensive strategies. We spent a lot of time focusing on the testicles.
 
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KHNC

KHNC

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Keep em coming. Im taking notes!
 

DeePow

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I heard they don’t like it when you blow in their face… I’d try that in combination with tickling
I heard they don’t like it when you blow in their face… I’d try that in combination with tickling
Jim Carey actually perfected the move in Liar, Liar. I’d urge everyone to revisit the movie to analyze technique
 

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TSAMP

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I have studied this craft since 1997, when the movie "The Edge" came out. As solid as Anthony Hopkins plan was, Mine differs. It invovles a MTB as a shield, I will give no more details out for free, Subscribe to my OnlyFans for the rest and to watch me run through live action scenarios with my neighbors cat.
 
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In all seriousness, I don't know how fast a grizzly bear is never been around them. But couple weeks ago I had a very close encounter with a black bear I'm talking less then 3 feet charge out of a hole/den. I imagine a grizzly is alot faster,Be very cautious of your surroundings at all time in grizzly territory and I would definitely practice with the handgun you plan to take a lot.
 

promo

FNG
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i prefer the home alone method with a touch of The Edge. my hunting grounds are ripe with booby traps in case a griz tries to come in. I've got 10' poles sharpened at every corner, water buckets hanging from trees, and i always carry a pocketful of marbles... and a stapler.
 
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