Wondering If I'm The Only one in this Predicament

[doc holiday13]

I haven't talked to the majority of my siblings or parents in years. I'm mentally compartmented and a bit autistic. My brain did the mathing and realized the relationship was 1 way despite trying to mend the relationship. Its a bummer but I've made "new family". It truly doesn't bother me. I'm limited and strapped for time as it is, so one less holiday commitment, fewer birthday presents to buy, fewer arguments/disagreements

Its much like not staying in touch with people I work with. Once I leave that job, the chances of us hanging out are very low, like near zero. Only had the friendship because we were in the same hole working on the same widget 5x week

 

[Lionheart]

Maybe some more details about the “dust up” and apologies?

 

[MCS]

It can get way worse. Be civil but if he doesn't want to be friendly stop trying. I tried for years with my older brother and it was a waste of my time.

 

[CJohnson]

Spend more time talking to your brother and less time asking strangers on the internet for advice.

I’m a stranger on the internet, so take that advice for what’s its worth, lol.

 

[Svivian]

Theres two sides to a story and the truth usually lies in the middle. Theres alot of missing information for anyone to help you. You also dont seem that brotherly when you use "dude" 4 times to describe him. It also seems like you also may be holding a grudge against him.

Might be worth looking in the mirror first like another poster mentioned.

 

[KsRancher]

That sucks. I have been told by a lot of people that I am a heartless bastard. I haven't talked to my mom in 15yrs. Dont plan on talking to or seeing her ever again. My sister has a no-contact court order against her and my brother has the same stance as me. But if you treat me right I will do anything for you.

For instance. My brother called me last summer and said he jeep motor locked up in south Texas. I hooked onto the trailer and drove down 700 miles, loaded him up and drive back home. He would do the exact same thing for me. My list of "people" is small. But they are great people.

I would give it a good chance and if they dont take it. I am out and on with life.

 

[Rotnguns]

Shit don’t know what dudes’ problem is seems like a hell of a long time to carry all that anger on your person

Easier for me to say than to do, but have you considered asking him what his problem is?

 

[RockAndSage]

This kind of stuff generally doesn't happen without other family drama, trauma, and addictions, often parental - by action or by absence.

And that stuff doesn't happen without damaging everyone in the home.

Look to yourself first, and when you've done an immense amount of self-work that prioritizes genuine self-illumination and forgiveness of self and others, then you might be ready to heal up that relationship. But there's no guarantees your brother ever will be. Be ready for that, with firm boundaries but an open heart.