Quitting Alcohol

[roosiebull]

Not trying to start shit here man, so take this for what it’s worth.
Some people just can’t have one or ten. I know some people who don’t drink that I would not want to **** with on my best day and their worst day. Not drinking does not make someone a pussy or a coward, it’s a personal thing. Some people just go bat shit and can’t control it, want to fight the whole world and then burn it down when they’re done pissing on it.
I’ve witnessed people lose all self control, beat up their best friends, rip a line of blow off the dash board then go screw up their relationship or marriage because….. well they got shit faced drunk. It’s a pretty shitty site at times, especially when your the one that ends up running damage control come sun up.
If you don’t want to quit and you can handle your liquor good for you man, but some are just possessed and out of control.

Well said, and spot on.

a big motivation for me besides the obvious was I had just started dating my now wife of 13yrs in a month, I worked out of town, and out of state sometimes commercially diving sea urchins… I wasn’t worried about messing up myself, which is probably a bad attitude anyways, because drinking a lot and often is asking for it, even though I thought I could handle that aspect… you can, until the right set of scenarios lines up and you’re hammered… I have seen it too many times.

the main thing for me was I knew the chance of our relationship working out were not great if I’m out of town more than in town and drinking every night after work, I didn’t want her having to worry about it… drinking is probably the demise of over half failed relationships (a big factor at least)

i’m lucky I didn’t kill myself, doing what I did for work, can’t really afford to be off your game, and I remember plenty of mornings waking up not sober, getting ready, going out in the ocean, jumping into 46* water in a wetsuit, and having hot flashes for the first couple hours of the day in cold ass water… pretty crazy looking back at how reckless I was for a time period.

I think some people don’t have their lives too negatively effected drinking, and don’t overdo it day in and day out… I wasn’t one, I was going for it nightly.

it seemed fun at the time, but looking back it really wasn’t, it just made mornings rough, and I would constantly embarrass myself… not really bad, but more “I really did that/said that to so and so last night?”

I have seen a lot of friends do a lot of dumb **** too, and a bunch of relationships ended directly related to drinking.

I agree with you, some people can handle it just fine, some people don’t have a problem with alcohol, but drink pretty often often… there are times I wish I could have a good ipa with dinner, or a good margarita, but I know myself, and it’s not worth it to me… I have way too much at stake these days, and getting back into a drinking habit is not happening… it’s nice to not have that complication in life FOR ME

 

[Stubborn_bowhunter]

I have seen a lot of friends do a lot of dumb **** too, and a bunch of relationships ended directly related to drinking.

I agree with you, some people can handle it just fine, some people don’t have a problem with alcohol, but drink pretty often often… there are times I wish I could have a good ipa with dinner, or a good margarita, but I know myself, and it’s not worth it to me… I have way too much at stake these days, and getting back into a drinking habit is not happening… it’s nice to not have that complication in life FOR ME

I can't even fully recollect how many friendships, and relationships I've ruined with alcohol since highschool. Even if it was every now and then drinking. I'd get wasted and be an asshole. I definitely wish I learned from my mistakes earlier, but that's life.

Being self destructive definitely doesn't have a positive impact on the world around me.

I tell myself there's other good tasting drinks that don't put me in a shitty headspace. Seeing other people get trashed when I'm sober also reassures me I made the right choice giving it up.

 

[Opah]

Not trying to start shit here man, so take this for what it’s worth.
Some people just can’t have one or ten. I know some people who don’t drink that I would not want to **** with on my best day and their worst day. Not drinking does not make someone a pussy or a coward, it’s a personal thing. Some people just go bat shit and can’t control it, want to fight the whole world and then burn it down when they’re done pissing on it.
I’ve witnessed people lose all self control, beat up their best friends, rip a line of blow off the dash board then go screw up their relationship or marriage because….. well they got shit faced drunk. It’s a pretty shitty site at times, especially when your the one that ends up running damage control come sun up.
If you don’t want to quit and you can handle your liquor good for you man, but some are just possessed and out of control.

It was in fun, with all the covid do this, take that, walk this way,
and come on, pulling our canines teeth to show support and of course the LOL
at the end. wasn't it obvious ?

 

[hunt1up]

This thread has helped me a bunch. I check in on it every few days for a little motivation. While I haven't totally quit drinking, the past few weeks I've been able to greatly reduce my intake. I've been a daily drinker for many years and killing a 12 pack a night was never a problem. The past few weeks I've got back into the routine of tracking my daily diet of both food and alcohol and monitoring it closely. I've started replacing beer with some NA beers and other non-beer liquids. With past moderation attempts I didn't replace beer with anything and I failed. I think it's much like people with cigarettes, having the can in hand and the act of drinking is half the addition for me. So subbing in a NA or a sparkling water sort of scratches the itch.

The lower amount of daily caloric intake is HUGE. I've lost a few pounds in just the past 1-2 weeks. Sleep has been better, I've been more active, and I find myself more aware of my diet.

I'm trying this moderation plan for myself since cold turkey never seemed to work. I'm certainly NOT advocating that everyone do it this way as I know it can be an epic failure for some people. Sometimes a hard stop is the best and only way. I just wanted to let people know that sometimes self improvement can be incremental and at the moment this plan seems to be taking me in the right direction.

Congrats to the OP and the rest of you guys that have improved your lives. It's very inspiring!

 

[Boarmaster]

I used to drink often and heavy back in my younger days. When I turned about 45 I pulled it back. I was getting to old to be hanging around the bars. Im a lifelong single guy so the bar always a place to hang out for some company. I never got into trouble or felt like I had to have another drink when it was time to go home work. I enjoy a beer or a drink with my buddys at camp or a bottle of wine with a woman on a date but I sure dont make it a habit.
I stopped hanging out at the bars regular when one Christmas Eve I stopped by the bar on my way home after my family dinner . All the usual old guys was sitting at the bar. I set down with them. After a few drinks I thought “ damn I sure hope I dont end up like these guys” I looked up and in the mirror behind bar there I was. “One of them guys”. I paid my tab and never looked back.

 

[SwampBone]

Lots of motivating stories here! I cant wait till I can say I haven't touched the stuff in years like some of you. I quit chewing 3 years ago after 17 years of that nasty habit. Hopefully I can quit another worthless habit. I'm like a lot of you. If I start I cant stop. Cannot moderate whatsoever. Generally twice a week. Looking back at all the wasted days dealing with hangovers is honestly disgusting. At 40 years of age I've noticed it isnt just the physical hangover the next day but the mental hangover that can last for multiple days afterward. I'm a little over a month sober today. Actually sleeping throughout the night is a huge positive. Not to mention steady bowel movements.

 

[Stubborn_bowhunter]

I highly recommend the latest Kifarucast. They talk about mental health and @Aron Snyder opens up about some deep stuff.

Needed to hear it this morning. Definitely helped my mindset going into today.

 

[Bryant S. Campbell]

I have been sober for 27 years now. I was using alcohol to numb the physical and mental pain after an accident in the Army left me permanently disabled. Quitting saved my marriage and my life. The main thing that helped me was my faith and the guys in my church .

 

[Rackmaster77]

Recently came to the conclusion I want/need to stop drinking. I've seen a few guys on here say they've been sober for years.

I've been pretty strong willed when it comes to kicking habits, but this one has been a one step forward three steps back one. Haha

Those of you who have stopped did you notice many benefits on your hunts, mindset, or physical shape?
Any tips on the process?

I started bowhunting in 91, started drinking earlier than that. My bowhunting decreased around 2010 when my drinking increased, I put the bottle down in 2019, back to bowhunting, lots of predator hunting, more money for equipment, better health, you name it and it's better. I did choose a treatment program to help me stop and I haven't touched the stuff since. I'm amazed at myself again and what I can accomplish, best of luckto you, strong will of self preservation is the key. Feel free to reach out, plenty of us here ✌

 

[*zap*]

If I could do it anyone can.....one day @ a time, an hour @ a time or a minute @ a time....whatever it takes. Purpose over pleasure.

 

[Where's Bruce?]

I became a bit too casual & frequent with liquor during Covid (as many did) and some believed me to be a possible alcoholic. I have always said I am not and can quit liquor any time I wish. My last drink was eight weeks ago in June and I have absolutely no cravings and do not feel deprived. I believe alcoholics suffer far more when addiction is the battle rather than simply proving to yourself that you are in control. If you want to stop drinking, you simply stop. You select a course of action and do it. If you find this a truly difficult thing, then you need to consider getting help for addiction. JMO...I could be wrong.

 

[Rackmaster77]

I became a bit too casual & frequent with liquor during Covid (as many did) and some believed me to be a possible alcoholic. I have always said I am not and can quit liquor any time I wish. My last drink was eight weeks ago in June and I have absolutely no cravings and do not feel deprived. I believe alcoholics suffer far more when addiction is the battle rather than simply proving to yourself that you are in control. If you want to stop drinking, you simply stop. You select a course of action and do it. If you find this a truly difficult thing, then you need to consider getting help for addiction. JMO...I could be wrong.

Correct, and I pray that works for you forever. I'm not a label guy, or stereotyper, however, what you just said, I said several times, for several years. And then boom , I couldn't. I function abnormally well with high tolerance and extreme levels of alcohol. It got me, I was trapped even though I swore I would never be "that guy" I had the pride and integrity of being in control of everything I do. And boom , I was an alcoholic in desperate need of help before I lost everything. Nothing was truly on the verge of being lost, but had I continued I guarantee I would not be sharing this with you now. I am so grateful to whatever made me decide to stop and for the life I live today. Be careful folks, she's an attractive dangerous bitch that'll kick you in the nutz while pulling the knife from your back after seducing you into her bedroom...Happy Hunting

 

[midwestwi]

I've been sober going on 13 years. January 2009 I woke up to an empty quiet house in a small pool of my own saliva and blood. Usually it was non-stop noise from the kids playing, etc. Wife had packed them up and left and went to her mom's. I could vaguely remember the night before her yelling at me and throwing a bunch of her broken house decorations at me after I mixed too many pills with alcohol and went face-first into a nice decorative rack of things she had since childhood. Brought the whole shelf down and broke a ton of her things. Layed out on the floor unable to move with a shelf and a bunch of broken ceramic shit all over me. The pills were from a neck surgery I had just had a few days prior. The neck issue was a large part of the drinking but not all of it. (Full disclosure I use THC edibles for pain issues now in the eve and at night and they have really changed my life for the better.)

I tried to get her back and she said no way, not until you're done drinking.

So I went and did an alcohol assessment about a week later. I didn't have anything to drink in the week before the assessment and the lady was confused as to why I wasn't going through withdrawals. I have this unfortunate problem of having an extremely high tolerance (for drugs too), which actually makes my alcohol abuse worse because I have to drink insane amounts to get the same effect. I was easily drinking a case a night and many nights and weekend nights it was easily two cases. But I never did have withdrawal issues. Massive cravings, but not physical withdrawals.

I went to AA for a few months and listened to some old timers who showed me love and understanding and shared their experiences (turns out I had nothing to complain about in comparison). A few of those guys were sober going on 35 and 40 years and one was 50 odd years sober. AA was good to keep me focused those first few months. That and keeping my hands busy with projects. Basically I had to keep myself from getting bored so just started working on my old house, one little project at a time every waking moment I wasn't at work.

Wife and kids came back about 3 weeks after I did the assessment when she realized I was serious about making the change I never want to wake up again to a house as quiet as it was that morning in Jan '09. I still cringe when I think of it and the thought of it still makes me very uncomfortable.

It took about 4 years of sobriety before the fog in my brain started to lift. I was very difficult to be around and it nearly resulted in a permanent breakup with my wife many times over that time period. But she stuck it out with me. Her grandmother was a big influence on both my wife and myself. She was big into al-anon as a victim of an alcoholic father (her father put her on the tractor wreckage at 5 years old after he had just killed a motorist due to him driving the tractor drunk on the road, she took the 'blame' for her father with the law when this happened in the 1940's). Once I got to 5 years I was much more comfortable with myself without alcohol. An old timer from work who has been sober for over 30 years told me 5 years is a very important milestone in sobriety. He said that was the point for him where he really started coming around and was able to deal with his issues. His story was interesting. His wife is Native American and dragged him into the bush (N MN) for two full years and they lived in a tipi together while he recovered. 100% in the bush for two full years. She had someone drop off limited supplies every few weeks. He is probably the most kind and caring soul I have ever met. He lives on the water in a canoe and hunts and fishes every spare moment he has when not at work.

I have a long family history of alcohol abuse on both sides of my family. And some significant mental health history on one side too. I recently lost an uncle who was basically a father to me in my teens due to his abuse of alcohol and prescription drugs. He is the one that got me into hunting and guns/bows when I was just a little kid. Sadly I had to stop going with him and the rest of the family hunting each fall after I quit drinking because they continued to hit it so hard. The last straw was him blowing a hole in the roof of the cabin with his "unloaded" 7mm Rem Mag. That was the first time I had my son with to the camp and he was only about 5 years old. When I told them I was done with deer camp he took it as hard as I did and we still talked and hung out often and he did respect my decision and even refrained from drinking around me. But his need for it was so bad that our time together was always very short, an hour or two at most.

All of this might sound depressing but I'll tell you this, its all just part of my journey. I went from being an unproductive 'boy' at 29 years old to productive and active beyond belief as a man. I'm 41 now, I have my wife back (we still have our moments and things are not easy) and kids, and since I've been sober added 3 more for a total of 5. The oldest just moved out to start school, we have 4 left in the house, one teen and 3 that are 5 and under. I took all the energy over the last 13 that I used to spend drinking and sunk it into hard work and good decision-making and have been working very hard at having a positive healthy relationship with my wife. It was not always easy and its not supposed to be.

Now my house/land (wife shot 160" whitetail 100 yards behind house 2 years ago) is paid for, my cars are paid for, the tractor is paid for, and in a year I will be 100% debt free. My wife gives me my freedom because she can trust me now. I get almost 40 days off now per year, paid. I take 4-6 weeks during Oct, Nov, Dec and just hunt. Mostly deer but also mule deer and elk last season and this fall elk again. Its been an interesting journey but the reality is that I would not have a beautiful wife and kids and all of this freedom and cool shit if I hadn't quit drinking. My body still hurts, I need 2 more neck surgeries, a lower back surgery, and a few other things but that's ok. I'm going somewhere and it seems like good places.

You can do the same, just decide once and for all that you are done, and then take it one day at a time. If AA works for you, then go to AA. Do what works for you. And don't let yourself get too comfortable. That is your danger zone.

 

[Stubborn_bowhunter]

I've been sober going on 13 years. January 2009 I woke up to an empty quiet house in a small pool of my own saliva and blood. Usually it was non-stop noise from the kids playing, etc. Wife had packed them up and left and went to her mom's. I could vaguely remember the night before her yelling at me and throwing a bunch of her broken house decorations at me after I mixed too many pills with alcohol and went face-first into a nice decorative rack of things she had since childhood. Brought the whole shelf down and broke a ton of her things. Layed out on the floor unable to move with a shelf and a bunch of broken ceramic shit all over me. The pills were from a neck surgery I had just had a few days prior. The neck issue was a large part of the drinking but not all of it. (Full disclosure I use THC edibles for pain issues now in the eve and at night and they have really changed my life for the better.)

I tried to get her back and she said no way, not until you're done drinking.

So I went and did an alcohol assessment about a week later. I didn't have anything to drink in the week before the assessment and the lady was confused as to why I wasn't going through withdrawals. I have this unfortunate problem of having an extremely high tolerance (for drugs too), which actually makes my alcohol abuse worse because I have to drink insane amounts to get the same effect. I was easily drinking a case a night and many nights and weekend nights it was easily two cases. But I never did have withdrawal issues. Massive cravings, but not physical withdrawals.

I went to AA for a few months and listened to some old timers who showed me love and understanding and shared their experiences (turns out I had nothing to complain about in comparison). A few of those guys were sober going on 35 and 40 years and one was 50 odd years sober. AA was good to keep me focused those first few months. That and keeping my hands busy with projects. Basically I had to keep myself from getting bored so just started working on my old house, one little project at a time every waking moment I wasn't at work.

Wife and kids came back about 3 weeks after I did the assessment when she realized I was serious about making the change I never want to wake up again to a house as quiet as it was that morning in Jan '09. I still cringe when I think of it and the thought of it still makes me very uncomfortable.

It took about 4 years of sobriety before the fog in my brain started to lift. I was very difficult to be around and it nearly resulted in a permanent breakup with my wife many times over that time period. But she stuck it out with me. Her grandmother was a big influence on both my wife and myself. She was big into al-anon as a victim of an alcoholic father (her father put her on the tractor wreckage at 5 years old after he had just killed a motorist due to him driving the tractor drunk on the road, she took the 'blame' for her father with the law when this happened in the 1940's). Once I got to 5 years I was much more comfortable with myself without alcohol. An old timer from work who has been sober for over 30 years told me 5 years is a very important milestone in sobriety. He said that was the point for him where he really started coming around and was able to deal with his issues. His story was interesting. His wife is Native American and dragged him into the bush (N MN) for two full years and they lived in a tipi together while he recovered. 100% in the bush for two full years. She had someone drop off limited supplies every few weeks. He is probably the most kind and caring soul I have ever met. He lives on the water in a canoe and hunts and fishes every spare moment he has when not at work.

I have a long family history of alcohol abuse on both sides of my family. And some significant mental health history on one side too. I recently lost an uncle who was basically a father to me in my teens due to his abuse of alcohol and prescription drugs. He is the one that got me into hunting and guns/bows when I was just a little kid. Sadly I had to stop going with him and the rest of the family hunting each fall after I quit drinking because they continued to hit it so hard. The last straw was him blowing a hole in the roof of the cabin with his "unloaded" 7mm Rem Mag. That was the first time I had my son with to the camp and he was only about 5 years old. When I told them I was done with deer camp he took it as hard as I did and we still talked and hung out often and he did respect my decision and even refrained from drinking around me. But his need for it was so bad that our time together was always very short, an hour or two at most.

All of this might sound depressing but I'll tell you this, its all just part of my journey. I went from being an unproductive 'boy' at 29 years old to productive and active beyond belief as a man. I'm 41 now, I have my wife back (we still have our moments and things are not easy) and kids, and since I've been sober added 3 more for a total of 5. The oldest just moved out to start school, we have 4 left in the house, one teen and 3 that are 5 and under. I took all the energy over the last 13 that I used to spend drinking and sunk it into hard work and good decision-making and have been working very hard at having a positive healthy relationship with my wife. It was not always easy and its not supposed to be.

Now my house/land (wife shot 160" whitetail 100 yards behind house 2 years ago) is paid for, my cars are paid for, the tractor is paid for, and in a year I will be 100% debt free. My wife gives me my freedom because she can trust me now. I get almost 40 days off now per year, paid. I take 4-6 weeks during Oct, Nov, Dec and just hunt. Mostly deer but also mule deer and elk last season and this fall elk again. Its been an interesting journey but the reality is that I would not have a beautiful wife and kids and all of this freedom and cool shit if I hadn't quit drinking. My body still hurts, I need 2 more neck surgeries, a lower back surgery, and a few other things but that's ok. I'm going somewhere and it seems like good places.

You can do the same, just decide once and for all that you are done, and then take it one day at a time. If AA works for you, then go to AA. Do what works for you. And don't let yourself get too comfortable. That is your danger zone.

Wow, man. I can't even get myself to cut out and quote specific parts because all of this really inspired me.
Thank you so much for sharing your story.
It really resonated with me.

I'm 26, and have finally started to figure out what I actually want out of my life. Seeing you push through the journey to create that life for you and your family really brings a smile to my face.
It inspires me knowing that it's possible for me too.

Living in a tipi with a beautiful native American lady doesn't sound half bad. Some Jeremiah Johnson stuff.


Starting this thread has had such a positive impact on my life, guys. I really appreciate all of you.

 

[Boarmaster]

Im sure back in the day I missed out on opportunities to take up with nice women because of my drinking and hell raising. I say this as I recently decided to stop dating a woman who I thought was a nice professional person. The first few dates went well but then I noticed the more wine she had the nastier she got. Seemed like every date got worse. I finally decided she wasnt going to be for me. I was never a mean or nasty drunk but it made me realize why a women might not want to hitch her cart to my wagon. Another one of them look in the mirror moments.…..

 

[Stubborn_bowhunter]

10 weeks sober today.
Killed a bull at the beginning of the month. Working on killing a bear.

While it's been some frustrating shit at times just facing all my issues head on. I've definitely been a better version of myself.
First hunting season in a few years that I had zero hangovers in September.

Thanks again, guys. Hope everyone is doing well and having a rad September.

 

[Nfish]

10 weeks sober today.
Killed a bull at the beginning of the month. Working on killing a bear.

While it's been some frustrating shit at times just facing all my issues head on. I've definitely been a better version of myself.
First hunting season in a few years that I had zero hangovers in September.

Thanks again, guys. Hope everyone is doing well and having a rad September.

That's awesome, good job! I hit 6 months tomorrow. For me its gotten easier these past few months, but like you said it's frustrating at times.

 

[Gooseslayer]

Some very good advice in these comments!

 

[ODB]

I was just thinking about this thread last night and hoping everyone was doing well.

Glad to see it popped back up and folks are still kicking ass.

 

[country_20boy]

I can take it or leave it but congrats to any of you for quitting. It’s not easy but for some is a good decision