Can I ruin your day?

seww

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My dad passed away in January, I was traveling to go see him as I knew he was close and I missed him by 2 hours. I was waiting for my last connecting flight and my sister called that he had taken his last breath.
It's never easy, my dad was only 73 but suffered from a very unique dementia and had been in a home for the past few years. Last time I saw him was back in 2020 before we moved to the US.

And for anyone who has been through the same, which is probably most of us, and the rest knows it's coming sooner or later, I want to share a song my sister found. I don't know how popular it is, but it really hits home. It will probably hit right in the heart for many of us.
 

go_deep

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Sorry sir. That is neither the day or the time in my life I am looking forward to.
 

ODB

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I was lucky enough to spend my mom's last days on earth with her. She died a week ago Sunday. It is not easy, but I would not trade it for anything. Given the fact she dedicated her whole life to raising us, the least I could do was be there. I am sure your dad knew how much you loved and appreciated him.


As to the song - you say goodbye by holding them deep in your heart and your thoughts, and telling them they will not be forgotten - and then don't forget.
 
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seww

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Thanks guys. It was and still is tough at times. It's hard to imagine a life without the one person that was always there for you.

Our mom is still alive but haven't had any contact with her in many years so I don't even count her.

It's a part of life for all of us. I wanted to share this song because I'm sure many of us feel the same way about losing our near and dear who would have our backs anytime. It sure sucks but that day is coming for everybody...
 
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CorbLand

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My wife and I ran the numbers and I think I am at one funeral every 3.5 years if you only count close family and friends. It sucks.

Lost my dad when I was four, cousin and best friend when I was six and my grandma, who I was very close with when I was sixteen. All in the blink of an eye. My last grandparent died a couple weeks ago an hour before I got on a plane to go hunting for a week.

I know I am a smart ass and talk a lot of shit on here but please, take the time to spend time with family and cherish those moments. It can and does turn upside down in the blink of an eye.

There is no easy way to lose a family member, that is for sure.
 

ewade07

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When I was 17 I was in Whitefish, MT for a golf tournament when I got a call from my older brother that my dad had passed away. Almost 18 years later I can remember the words he said to me breaking the news. Everything else after that was a blur for about 2 years. I held not being there against myself for a long, long time. It ate at me for years. Overtime I came to realize that shit happens and it was nothing that I did. I was just living my life and something terrible happened.

It may fall on deaf ears now, but its ok. Forgive yourself for not being there. It may take some time but take solice in all the memories you have with him.
 
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Sorry for your loss. My wife just lost her father. I've also lost loved one's, it's tough. Best wishes to you and your family!
 
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seww

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Life happens and we can only wish for the best. I'm not mad at myself for not making it there, I had already said my good byes to him before we went off due to the dementia. The last 2 years he wasn't himself and I had already lost him.

But life is short, we must remember to enjoy the now with our close friends and family, the ones who means something to us. There're a lot of crazy things going on in this world right now but I find it important to focus on what I can control. I cannot make a difference in Ukraine or Israel, I cannot put a lonely child to sleep in a safe room in Africa. I can however, make sure my son has a secure room to sleep in, food every day and to make sure he will cherish me when it's my time to go...
 

ODB

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Life happens and we can only wish for the best. I'm not mad at myself for not making it there, I had already said my good byes to him before we went off due to the dementia. The last 2 years he wasn't himself and I had already lost him.


I know exactly what you mean. The last time my mom knew who I was was probably three years ago - if that. I spent seven days watching my mom die so my dad didn't have to do it alone. In those last hours my mom was still teaching me lessons on toughness and love, and most of all, stop sitting around whining about how bad your life is - it isn't as bad as it could be..in other words - a typical mom.
 
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seww

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I know exactly what you mean. The last time my mom knew who I was was probably three years ago - if that. I spent seven days watching my mom die so my dad didn't have to do it alone. In those last hours my mom was still teaching me lessons on toughness and love, and most of all, stop sitting around whining about how bad your life is - it isn't as bad as it could be..in other words - a typical mom.
That's awesome for you! Great you were there for both your mom and dad during the hard time.
 
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Marble

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My dad is 73. Still pretty sharp, but a PITA sometimes.

I just finished an elk hunting trip with him in CO. First year he only hunted 1 day.

I'm sorry for your loss and wish you have great memories to think of when you think of your dad.

Sent from my SM-S918U using Tapatalk
 
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DiabeticKripple

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Similar story here. Dad called me on a Sunday saying my grandfather wasn’t doing very well but he figured I’d have a few days to come home on Wednesday since it was easier to get home from work that day.

Had an hour long flight, when I landed at my home airport I got a Tex saying he had passed. I would’ve been there in 2 hours from the time I landed. Pretty rough cause I could’ve been home at any point before, but chose to stay to make things easy for work.
 
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gbflyer

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Feb 20, 2017
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Work with my old man every day. 74. I have since I was a kid, all I know. I get pissed at him sometimes but I sure will miss him someday. But it won’t be soon, he went from dump truck to motor grader to shovel today. Haha.
 

HTNFSH

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So sorry for your loss buddy. Mine passed just after his 59th birthday in May of 2007. I was just getting my career going a looking forward to planning some fishing and hunting trips. It's never easy and always cherish the moments you do have with family.
 

Rich M

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Sorry for your loss. Tough times.

Lost my mom last year and my wife lost her dad a couple weeks back.

I try to spend time every week w my dad.
 

Yoder

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Sorry for your loss. My grandparents raised me and I missed being with my grandmother by one day and when my Grandfather passed they "didn't want to bother me" in the middle of the night. I was so pissed. I would have walked 50 miles in the rain if I had to. I know it didn't matter in the end. They both knew how much I loved them. Your dad knew as well.
 
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seww

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Aug 10, 2020
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Thanks everybody!
Not what I expected with my thread but I really appreciate the kind words. I know I'm not alone and that helps.

To me, the song I shared is just hitting so right. I figured maybe someone else will react the same way and get some fond memories of good times passed.
 
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Sherman

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Jul 15, 2021
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Thanks for the song. Not looking forward to any of this, though I know it’s coming. The thought also makes me reflect on my relationships and time with my own sons and what’s really important.
 

BigE

Lil-Rokslider
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Apr 3, 2022
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My father died about 30 years ago and I still carry a rifle of his at least once per deer or elk hunt.
 
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