Am I crazy for expecting a leader ship role vs a lower stress position for close to the same money?

I tried the higher stress leadership thing for a while, hated every minute of it. Add that to the fact that I’d have to be several steps up in leadership to make more than I do now (would work less weekends and holidays though), leaving that position was a choice I couldn’t have been more confident in making. Hopefully my mind and body hold up so I can retire where I’m at. If I get feeble and dumb, I’ll then be a perfect fit for leadership around this place.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
Don’t burn any bridges with short notice and you don’t usually have much of a risk going to another company, unless they don’t like you. However, there is more to the new company than just the job. Management and culture are never the same, for better or worse.

If you say you’re bored where you’re at, will you be bored at the new place? Some people at some companies will suggest you find a way to get interested in your “boring” job, or you’ll be seen as a bad hire. Some people at some companies will hug you and hope you’re ok.

I don’t have the patience to work for most people, so leading groups works well. I also don’t have the patience to lead slow or under performing team members, so I’ve had the best luck carefully selecting positions and it’s worked out well. I’d say that’s also an accurate description of the wife’s career, and that of a few close friends.

It’s great to have choices - probably not a bad decision either way. :)
 
You should have a better idea of what you are getting into at your current employer. If they are good to work for and you will like your superiors, that counts for a lot.

Stress is also relative. Objectively, my current job has more responsibilities, I make high stakes decisions multiple times a day. However, my lower responsibility position prior to this was more stressful. Some of it was the environment, but some of it is it really sucks to know what needs to be done, but lack the ability to do it.

I have seen other people that simply don't handle the role transition well and have no business being in the advanced role because they are scared to make hard decisions when everything you do can lead to a bad outcome.

That is a long winded way of saying we can help you think it through, but only you and brutal self honesty can get to the answer most likely to turn out well and sometimes the hardest admission is that we are better off not stretching ourselves, just because we can, doesn't mean we should.

Athletic training is an example. I can add more miles a week rapidly, but it will cost me in the end and limit my ability to achieve goals as I over train. I literally aggrandized for 3 days over signing up for the longer or shorter course on a winter ultra, the race is just for fun and as much as I hate only running the short course, that fits my current training plan and goals better (this summer I plan on completing a distance I have wanted to do for years).

Define your goals. If they are not clearly defined, at least get an idea of were you want to end up. Then select the position that builds the most bridges in that direction.

I would love to jump back into a higher stress environment in my current role, but family takes precedent in my personal goals, so I will stay where I'm at, at least for now.
 
I took a leadership role at 29 mostly due to the challenge and increase in pay. I'll be going back to worker bee status in the next 3 years. As much as I would love to pull the plug on it right this second, you'll find that is harder to do the higher you go. For me, I lost sight of my priorities, specifically my time off and flexibility that got me into this industry in the first place.

Fire9 nailed it when he said be prepared to deal with everyone's bad days if you are directly managing employees.

What I would suggest is to talk to your current employer and tell them about the new opportunity and specifically the pay for less responsibility/stress. They may sweeten the pot in order to keep you!

Good luck!
 
Don't overlook the importance of a company's culture. You know one well but hopefully have some sense for what the other one is like. No role or title or wage can make up for working somewhere you don't like the culture.

People are everything.
 
A few questions.

1. How long do you plan to be at either company?
2. Do you like the current company and management and do they like you?
3. Do you have any experience as management .... some people aren't very good at it and some don't like it?
 
I would probably choose the company I wanted to work for. Meaning, whichever company I think would be betterto work for. I wouldn't change companies unless there was a substantial difference in pay.

I would also consider the ability to move in the company. Not only in pay, but is there different jobs in the company I could do.
 
Last edited:
I’ve had a similar conundrum as of late. I was in a super boring role that I always saw as a step down from what I was doing formerly. I was on an elk hunt and my boss and departmental manager were blowing up my Zoleo begging me to take over someone else’s role when I got back because they quit with like a 4 day notice. Their job was a disaster because they were disorganized, it was very important (but boring), and nobody else had ever paid attention to what this person did and how they did it. I took the role as a favor because they really wanted someone to figure it out.

I was hourly, and this position paid somewhere close to $10 less an hour. But they let me keep my old rate of pay if I agreed to do it. It was a project at first, which I enjoyed, but once I had it figured out I was getting paid ~25k more a year than anyone should have been to do it. It was something that I could personally do in my sleep, but the easy, boring, repetitiveness of it had slowly drove me crazy over the last few years. I was driving everyone else crazy by hopping onto every project I could and sticking my nose in absolutely everything that was none of my business.

Eventually someone in leadership retired and I was pushed, yet again, to take over. It is only about a $10k raise (close to 20 with bonus’ which are not a guarantee) but drastically more work, more stress, more involvement, more of a challenge, and it brought along with it 37 (mostly great) direct reports to keep track of and on the straight and narrow. I enjoy it much more because of the challenge and because the days go by so much faster. I enjoy helping the people that work for me, making their jobs easier by doing mine, and altogether having the opportunity to be a (hopefully) positive influence on their lives, at least in the workplace.

Leadership isn’t for everyone, and it’s especially difficult going from a “Grunt” of sorts at your company, and working with everyone for years, building friendships. To all of a sudden being the boss of your friends, acquaintances, even people you dislike and that you know dislike you but you have to treat them fairly and as if there is no bad blood essentially overnight because it is your job to do so.

Stuff that you got away with as a worker, or an hourly employee, behaviors especially, make you look like a bag of ass really quickly in a leadership role. The stupid ice cleats that you have to wear when there’s snow in the ground that you hardly ever listened to? Yeah, you gotta abide by that now. And you have to act like you believe in it and live by it. Because the first time one of the guys gets hurt and the big deal safety people are asking why he didn’t have cleats on and he says “my supervisor said it was a stupid rule anyways, he never wears his or makes us wear them” will be the last time.

That said, a life without challenge is a boring one. Your growth as a person will be restricted if you don’t expose yourself to trials and tribulations such as these. Maybe you don’t like it, and you go do something else, but at least you tried. But you might love it. You will learn a lot about interpersonal communication and how to communicate with and get through to different people when you do it for a living.

If you believe in yourself, and you think you can do it, you should. If you’re just in it for the small bump in pay, and the ability to throw your weight around, don’t. Your employees have to deal with you and live by your word until you move on to something else, or they do. They are relying on you, and they need you to come in every day with a good attitude and for you to try your best to be the best boss they have ever had. Even on the days that they are having a bad day and are being assholes. If you suck at your job, they will hate theirs, and either quit, or try to get rid of you.
 
Lots of good advice here to chew over. I suggest making a T chart and writing out the pros and cons of each. There is something very helpful about writing things out and putting thoughts on paper where you can visually see them.

Saying things out loud also helps.
 
Stress can be extremely detrimental to your health and a company ALWAYS needs productive workers whereas leadership roles are more expendable.

I was offered a Senior role years ago and declined. Happy as could be, zero stress, and it affords me more time than most Dads to spend with my son every day.

I have never regretted my decision, not once.
 
Its also important to clarify how we are characterizing stress. Men are made to bear a burden. "Too much stress will kill you, too little will make you weak."
 
That’s a tough one. I’ve been in some good leadership roles (~300-800 folks) and then I’ve had some roles that pay the same with near zero stress.

There is a difference between leadership and management (at least in my world). Management isn’t as fun, but equally as challenging. Know what you are getting into. Either will most certainly come with more stress, but that isn’t always a bad thing.

Think about what you want in future opportunities. Leadership in future roles (the experience) could pay much better. That opportunity could lead to others.

There is also something to be said for working for your current company….you know what you are getting. Tough to put a price on that.

Leadership is fun. Stress isn’t always. Good luck!

Edit: I will say I’m retiring this year in a low level leadership role (~15 folks) that is near zero stress and pays well. But at times I do miss the bigger roles and think I sold myself short. But for me it’s about the family now.
 
Last edited:
The thing about doing a job well or as some would say, being successful, is that it pretty much always requires you to significantly exceed what you're being compensated for. In lower/middle management, you're often little more than a glorified key carrier. You're often held to criteria/costs which you have little or no control over. It often means you just have to do it all yourself and that's a grind of a different sort. Both your employees and your supervisors yank you around like you're on a string. The first year is kinda cool though. Learning the job and getting good at it and all. After that they just start piling more on you and never taking anything away... forever. That's what management is really like. Hopefully it pays "good enough" and by that I mean you can eventually get a house and maybe sock something away for retirement cause that "will" come. I did some middle mgt stuff for many years. It was rough but I thank God for it because it provided and gave me almost all of what I have. Would I do it again? Depends... If I was relatively marketable in an industry that I could make a lateral move if something happened to my job, and was making pretty good money, then no. But, if I had few options, no safety net but plenty of drive, then yes, because if you just keep swinging, scratching and clawing despite setbacks (and there will be setbacks), you're likely to do better than if you just froze during your peak earning years.
 
Some are meant to lead, some are meant to follow, the world needs both. Figure out what you're meant to do, and do it. Money and stress and everything else is all relative and how you handle it.
 
How well do you know the other company and their culture and operating practices? Let’s say I used to work for Pepsi and now work for Coke. I don’t agree with how Coke outlines the management role or the general way they operate so I wouldn’t take that management role. Knowing how Pepsi has changed I would take that management role in a heartbeat but wouldn’t take a lateral position. Some roles are better or worse depending on the company not simply the job title.

Another thought. You seem to want a challenge with rewards. Are you passionate about your industry or job? If not then take the non leadership job and seek your fulfillment elsewhere via volunteer, second job, coaching a kids sport etc.
 
I accepted a lead engineer position about 5 years before I retired with a raise, guaranteed raises every year and some other perks. It involved quite a bit more travel and a lot more work. It was not worth it.
Same strategy I pursued. That sacrifice in the last 5 is the gift that keeps on giving. And, the promotion positioned me well for consulting work.
 
Yes you are crazy. Management sounds cool until you actually do it. I took on a “management” role backing 2017 and it basically doubled, even tripled my workload and only paid like 10k more a year. Rather than practicing my craft I was dealing with adults who were acting like children.

My dad told me that’s how it would be as he’d had the same experience in his professional life, on the other hand some people like drama and having no free time, my mom spent the last ~ 20 years of her career in upper management, when I was in highschool, weeks would go by where I wouldn’t see her, when I did see her at home, she was working. We lived in a big house and my parents drove Volvos but I never saw my mom, I still dont have much of a relationship with her all these years later. My dad always took my hunting and fishing, driving in the mountains to look at elk etc etc, my mom was always working at work, working at home, sleeping, crying or pissed off.

Additionally for all my mom gave to that upper management shit, when the hospital she worked for changed to a non-profit from for-profit, her job and salary just went away, they shuffled her to some job the next state over for her to work the last few years before she retired. It ruined my parents marriage and led to their divorce when I was like ~ 27.

As such, any time more “opportunities” come my way I usually stay away from them unless it’s something I actually want to do.
 
Back
Top