Taboo Topics of Discussion

[Marble]

3rd generation bipolar, social anxiety disorder.

#1 - Get help. Suck it up is not realistic with true mental illness.
#2 - I always tell folks. The best thing I came to learn was not to trust my own mind.

Happy to talk to anyone who is struggling or would like more information.


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Good for you man! I think it's probably something you had to learn as far as #2 goes. I have a bi-polar friend I grew up with. He still struggles all of the time. It's sad.

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[PlumberED]

It is commendable that you guys are willing to share and talk about your mental health struggles. Thank you.

 

[Stache Attack]

Wife has anxiety and little depression. I suffer from depression, try to self manage by working on projects and being outside. Think alcohol hurts it too… tough to manage but I don’t want to be a zombie as many who have went to pills are.

 

[TaperPin]

Our response to many of the things that stress us out are influenced greatly by our self talk. Thinking yourself in circles that escalates negative feelings isn’t easy to stop, but like anything in life the more you try the better you get at it. From small things to major persistent issues I have no control over at home or work, if I’m thinking about them in a negative way, or ruminating on them too much I literally remind myself “not helpful” and either reframe it in a healthier way or move on to something else.

For anxiety and depression, thought stopping and reframing can change your life. In relationships, thought stopping reduces conflicts and they get resolved faster. Anything that gets us thinking in unproductive circles, even if it’s what caliber our next rifle should be, can be helped.

This is not to diminish the importance of professional help for the most serious issues, or just opening up to others which is healthy for anyone.

 

[D S 319]

Listen to David Goggins and workout harder. A Tired brain has no energy to run rampant.

 

[displacedtexan]

Listen to David Goggins and workout harder. A Tired brain has no energy to run rampant.

The fun thing about some issues...

You can't always tire out your brain.

Or even body.

Exercise and such can help, and even provide all the help some need.

But the idea that everyone can get over it with the right ideas/reading/exercise/diet is part of what fuels people who need help not getting it.

It prevented me from it for a long time. And nearly cost me my life.

 

[jjohnsonElknewbie]

Thinking yourself in circles that escalates negative feelings isn’t easy to stop,

This right here...

Wife and oldest daughter take low doses of meds for anxiety. It seems to run on my wife's side of the family. Guys with anxiety have simply been called "high strung" for years, and her Dad is one of these. As he got older and started running into health issues, the anxiety really came to the forefront and was exacerbated. Every time he felt "off" his heart would start racing and he thought he was having a heart attack (this was after he had his first heart attack).

Good buddy did 4 tours in Kuwait, Iraq, and Afghanistan in the infrantry. His last tour was pure hell, and he came home with severe PTSD even though he hid it pretty well from his friends. His wife took the brunt of it with his leaving for days at a time and consuming huge quantities of alchohol to try to cope. At his worst he was drinking a pint of vodka for breakfast followed by an additional full bottle by the end of each day with lots of beers in between. He was fortunate to have the opportunity to attend a treatment program in MN dedicated to veterans and spent several months up there, not coming home until he was ready. Since then he has stayed off the booze 100% and avoids situations where folks are drinking heavily.

One of the biggest kicks in the nuts for him was that after completing treatment, the VA proceeded to cut his benefits because he "was all better". This forced him to change jobs and add a bunch of new stress into his life. Dude had dealt with this new challenge like a champ and is my hero.

 

[Dos Perros]

I've had some mild anxiety, mostly around the stresses of my job. A few times I've almost passed out at work over it. On days I know are going to be stressful I refrain drinking coffee and that has been a help.

I got a new job (position, same company) a little more than two years ago and my blood pressure is back down into the normal range.

 

[Mojave]

I am a combat veteran and I have PTSD.

There are two different parts of combat PTSD or maybe two different parts of my PTSD.

1. Night terrors, which I have learned to put a comic spin on. Imagine having the same types of dreams every night for 20 years. Being held down in your sleep by someone or something and not able to move. Seeing old men at the foot of the bed. Having things grab you hard or grab the bed hard in your sleep. Hearing canon fire and music in your sleep, or when the room is quiet.

2. Apprehension about crowds, traffic, amusement parks and so on.

Two things have helped me. There are tons of books written by others that suffer from combat PTSD. Read them. Especially if the guy that wrote it has learned how to deal with it. Don't read one by someone that is dealing with it, and doesn't have it figured out. Find someone that is beating it.

You will learn to beat it for the 2nd part. The night terrors, you will need clinical help for. For that one, ask your Doctor if you can try Prazosin at night.

 

[*zap*]

This stuff is preventable if you simplify your life. Leave the rat race cause the rats are going to win.

Walk everyday and no ear buds..get/raise a pup and take him along..Make/take the time to develop a great bond with the pup. Dump all negative people/things...

 

[TaperPin]

This right here...

Wife and oldest daughter take low doses of meds for anxiety. It seems to run on my wife's side of the family. Guys with anxiety have simply been called "high strung" for years, and her Dad is one of these. As he got older and started running into health issues, the anxiety really came to the forefront and was exacerbated. Every time he felt "off" his heart would start racing and he thought he was having a heart attack (this was after he had his first heart attack).

Good buddy did 4 tours in Kuwait, Iraq, and Afghanistan in the infrantry. His last tour was pure hell, and he came home with severe PTSD even though he hid it pretty well from his friends. His wife took the brunt of it with his leaving for days at a time and consuming huge quantities of alchohol to try to cope. At his worst he was drinking a pint of vodka for breakfast followed by an additional full bottle by the end of each day with lots of beers in between. He was fortunate to have the opportunity to attend a treatment program in MN dedicated to veterans and spent several months up there, not coming home until he was ready. Since then he has stayed off the booze 100% and avoids situations where folks are drinking heavily.

One of the biggest kicks in the nuts for him was that after completing treatment, the VA proceeded to cut his benefits because he "was all better". This forced him to change jobs and add a bunch of new stress into his life. Dude had dealt with this new challenge like a champ and is my hero.

I didn’t mean to imply that all someone has to do is think about things the right way and everything will solve itself, far from it - people need a lot more medical help with mental disorders across the board. Our family on both sides deals with anxiety issues of all sorts of flavors, medicated and not.

On meds or not, in a treatment program or not, with a variety or issues or not, on one extreme or the other, thought stopping and reframing is a commonly taught technique by mental health professionals to help coping on a daily basis and does help. It’s also used to emergency services to build up stress tolerance, used in the military, used in leadership training, and is right up there with one of Steven Covey’s 7 habits.

 

[String&stick]

Again for context I don't personally suffer from either anxiety or depression but have a wife and child that do, so take my comments with that in mind.

In addition to stating you should find someone to talk to, preferably a trained counselor, I would say don't get hung up on the first counselor you try. My wife is on #3 I believe and stopped going to the first two because they only got her surface level results. #3 she met while getting her EdS degree (between a masters and doctorate in school psychology of all things). This gal has done more for my wife in 3 months to help her anxiety than the other 2 did over a couple of years.

So don't be afraid to find the "right" counselor but definitely find one.

On top of that, once you've reached a place where you're comfortable, open up to a few friends, and especially communicate with your spouse. I'm a much better husband after listening to my wife describe a few sessions and learning how her anxiety starts to spiral. I'm not saying I can "cure" her or stop her anxiety. But with both her and my son, there were times I for damn sure wasn't helping and probably was fueling the spiral. Knowing more as the non anxious person I can spot things and recommend a break, walk, what not, or I can stop them and say hey let's discuss this problem and it's solutions. With my family members oftentimes discussing the issue at hand (even if they don't fully recognize it) leads to some problem solving and at a minimum slowing the spiral.

Having others in the know when your comfortable only helps if they are trusted friends!

 

[displacedtexan]

This stuff is preventable if you simplify your life. Leave the rat race cause the rats are going to win.

Walk everyday and no ear buds..get/raise a pup and take him along..Make/take the time to develop a great bond with the pup. Dump all negative people/things...

Incorrect.

Some are genetic, and many traumas are not preventable.

 

[TaperPin]

In addition to stating you should find someone to talk to, preferably a trained counselor, I would say don't get hung up on the first counselor you try.

That’s a very important point!

What I didn’t know about for a long time, and they won’t tell you unless asked, is that counselors come in two flavors - one set is only there to help you open up and essentially solve the problem yourself - the other set is more proactive about teaching coping mechanisms and pointing the person in a healthy direction.

If your counselor is just listening you can bet they are the first type.

 

[*zap*]

For the most part when I think of anxiety/depression I think that it is preventable/self treatable with lifestyle changes. Obviously a person cannot change the fact that they suffered a traumatic experience.
I hope everyone that has these issues finds a way to defeat them.

 

[dtrkyman]

I am not normally depressed or have anxiety but am really hard on myself, I tend to beat myself up at some point mentally most days.

Exercise helps quite a bit but does not eliminate it, my mind gets going and causes insomnia often.

Weird how I can down down a dark path quickly but not a positive one!

I do not take meds for anything and will keep it that way, thinking of trying some mushrooms but have never been a "drug" person, do not smoke, drink or anything but the Psilocybin is intriguing.

 

[displacedtexan]

For the most part when I think of anxiety/depression I think that it is preventable/self treatable with lifestyle changes. Obviously a person cannot change the fact that they suffered a traumatic experience.
I hope everyone that has these issues finds a way to defeat them.

There is a HUGE difference between feeling down or worried and a clinical issue.

The general ups and downs in life absolutely can be fixed with diet/exercise/habits. Medication could even quite likely make them worse.

But actual clinical issues? For me and many others the issues are caused by the chemicals our brains do and don't produce. There's no habitat or decision that will fix that.

 

[*zap*]

I disagree for the most part. But you can believe what you want.

 

[william schmaltz]

There are not enough walks to go on, bibles to read, boot straps to pull up, sugar/alcohol to cut to get over this stuff. All of those things can surely help. I used to have a somewhat similar mindset, so no hard feelings.

I essentially didn’t sleep for 6 months after seeing some truly horrific stuff. I would run in the middle of the night, read the book, you name it. When I did sleep, it was because the TV somehow put me to sleep (there was no option to lay in bed in silence). My personal rule is never drinking alone. No exceptions. I’ll have a few drinks at hunting camp or if a friend is over, but that’s it. I will also continue to avoid pharmaceuticals at all costs. Certain plants are legal in some states that the govt (backed by pharma) have kept illegal. That stuff can REALLY help in certain situations. I have a couple friends that have severe anxiety that use small amounts of cannabis essentially all day every day. Very productive, successful, and smart people. You would never know they’re dosing or that they have extreme anxiety. There is some very promising stuff where vets are being treated with shrooms for PTSD. Very exciting stuff, but I’m sure big pharma will sell the feds and the voters on keeping everyone on the addictive lab grown stuff instead.

I manage in life. Less everyday things trigger my PTSD and spirals these days. Did have one (very bad and rare) thing we saw in public about a month ago that set me off on an involuntary freak out on the level I thought only happened in war movies. Been shopping for a counselor since then. That involuntary moment really shined a light on how serious this shit really can be.

 

[Beendare]

Anxiety and Depression. It has always seemed that talking about this is "unmanly"...Well, who gives a crap, lets talk.
Do you have it?
What brings it on?
How do you deal with it?

My take; I think its Important to realize everyone goes through this to a degree.

Its helpful to know, you aren’t alone and there are tools and ways to solve these issues.

That said, my preferred old school tool is to keep pushing forward- grin