Money or Happiness

[MallardSX2]

I may be unconventional, but this is the worst advice. Too many men have been told over time to “man up”. Money is not everything, feelings and emotions are not invalid. This is not from a “woke” person but a realist. Kids can pave their own way and go to college. Scholarships and military opportunities can pay for school. Time cannot be returned, spend time and raise kids to be good people. The chase of money and material possessions will be the final nail in the coffin of our society

What terrific free spirit advice you offer. Does it come with a warm blanket?

 

[roadrunner]

I got:

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You got more time to serve than I do.

I'm sorry.

 

[cowdisciple]

I got:

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Nice. I need to set one of these. I'm down to 6 (more or less).

Go for midyear, though (or whenever in the year you've filled up the low tax rate income).

 

[AKBorn]

I'm not sure about the need to "set your kids up for life" - get them through high school, help them some with college if you really want to, but teaching them how to make good decisions and stand on their own two feet would be infinitely more valuable than setting them up for life, in my opinion. It's their life after all, they will likely want to decide what path they take.

 

[BravoNovember]

What terrific free spirit advice you offer. Does it come with a warm blanket?

No need to try and bring new perspective to you mind, it’s much too dense to try.

 

[49ereric]

i Never liked traveling for work as a heavy equipment operator or as an oiler on the pipeline. Lot of the time hostile work environment whether from other trades or other operators. I just kept saying pension pension pension and in June I’ll start getting modest checks. I did what I had to do for family. We put two kids thru college and they got out with zero debt. A sacrifice well worth it to us…

 

[CorbLand]

OP never stated what he makes and what level of pay cut he will take. Why do people assume he is going to go from a hill top mansion to poverty with this cut? I know people that a bad year for them is 250k.

As for the “man up” thing. Manning up is doing whatever it takes to put three squares on the table, a roof over their head and clothes on their backs. It’s not living a life of misery so your kid doesn’t have to pay for college or drives a brand new car. If that is what you choose to do for your family, fine but giving your family time and a happy life is just as fulfilling.

I have 15K worth of hunting shit in my basement, I would sell every ounce of it so my wife could eat but I am not going to sell it so she can eat steak and lobster every night. It’s a big difference.

 

[ddd-shooter]

I have been with the same company for 18 years and make a very good salary. A salary that I could not replicate if I decided to leave the company. I drive a desk for 50 hours a week.
The problem I've been having for the past couple years is I just can't get myself "motivated" to get going at work. I'm not enjoying working with the coworkers, not enjoying the industry anymore, and not really enjoying who I am at work.
If i was single or childless this debate might be easier, but my wife and i have 2 kids under 4 years old. At this point we could cover college tuition for the both of them. If i worked this job for another 20 years we could essentially set them up for life.
The feeling comes and goes but I'm constantly day dreaming about quitting this to pursue a more meaningful career, that would result in a significantly lower income, that i imagine would be more fulfilling but that's not guaranteed either.
In my mind i can justify staying for the money and my families financial future at the expense of my happiness (my happiness at work, outside of that I love life, but work is a big part of life). But I can also justify leaving knowing that my family will still be comfortable and I could potentially be a better father and husband.
I realize this is a good predicament to be in. Never gotten anyone's thoughts on this

You doing any meaningful things as hobbies/sidegigs?
Perhaps that would ease the struggle of the daily grind. Volunteer, mentor, church, etc. if you started something and just knew you could do it full time, make a little money and love it, then consider a change.

 

[CorbLand]

No need to try and bring new perspective to you mind, it’s much too dense to try.

There are two types of people in this world.

There are those that work to live and there are those that live to work.

Neither will ever convince the other they are right.

 

[fngTony]

Do you know what job would make you happy? If not then stay where you’re at while looking into what interests you.

 

[UpNorth89]

Saving up for retirement and your kids college is great but too many people don't live their lives well because they're too concentrated on retirement. Kids can always pay their own way through college and it seems like for many of them it's wasted time and money anyway. Live life well while you're physically able to.

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[Rich M]

Saving up for retirement and your kids college is great but too many people don't live their lives well because they're too concentrated on retirement. Kids can always pay their own way through college and it seems like for many of them it's wasted time and money anyway. Live life well while you're physically able to.

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Most folks dont save enough for retirement. Simple answer.

Know someone who valued doing “stuff” over saving. They want to sell house and move but cant afford to cause they pizzed it all away having fun.

Sounds like OP is in a top 10 spot and folks are saying to feed his emotions, sure, and teach yer wife to work at the dollar store to make extra money for Christmas gifts.

The answer is simple - build your $$$ pile, then play trying to be happy.

 

[MCS]

You could use a high paying job to fund your escape. If you stayed in the high paying job for 5-10 years and funneled extra money in to investments like index funds and realestate. You would be able to do whatever you want and not have to worry about a high income.

 

[CorbLand]

Most folks dont save enough for retirement. Simple answer.

Know someone who valued doing “stuff” over saving. They want to sell house and move but cant afford to cause they pizzed it all away having fun.

Sounds like OP is in a top 10 spot and folks are saying to feed his emotions, sure, and teach yer wife to work at the dollar store to make extra money for Christmas gifts.

The answer is simple - build your $$$ pile, then play trying to be happy.

I know a couple people that lived their life always saving for tomorrow at the expense of today and tomorrow never came.

 

[UpNorth89]

Most folks dont save enough for retirement. Simple answer.

Know someone who valued doing “stuff” over saving. They want to sell house and move but cant afford to cause they pizzed it all away having fun.

Sounds like OP is in a top 10 spot and folks are saying to feed his emotions, sure, and teach yer wife to work at the dollar store to make extra money for Christmas gifts.

The answer is simple - build your $$$ pile, then play trying to be happy.

I wasn't trying to say someone should blow all of their money but there should always be a happy medium.

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[fngTony]

I know a couple people that lived their life always saving for tomorrow at the expense of today and tomorrow never came.

That’s why I’m content with the middle of the road approach we took. We’re not in debt much other than the house, some savings etc but still paycheck to paycheck.

 

[thedutchtouch]

Welcome to the midlife crisis. Some of us get it early in our 30s, some in our 50s. I'm in a similar boat, but have decided to ride out the financial stability train and set myself up for an enjoyable retirement/my kids for success like my parents did for me. Nobody's going to be able to convince you one way or the other, you gotta decide for yourself. There's some new commercials out for nerdwallet that are pretty funny "don't make your future self hate you" it's some singing geriatrics talking about how they can't go on vacation and are working at 102 because you (they) made poor financial choices when they were younger. Doesn't make me want to buy whatever nerdwallet is selling, but it is a good reminder to stay the course (for me).

That said I am also doing my best to enjoy the now as well. I schedule hunt trips with my brother yearly and don't fully skimp and contribute everything to savings, you gotta have a few things to look forward to here and there to keep on keeping on.

 

[BravoNovember]

Most folks dont save enough for retirement. Simple answer.

Know someone who valued doing “stuff” over saving. They want to sell house and move but cant afford to cause they pizzed it all away having fun.

Sounds like OP is in a top 10 spot and folks are saying to feed his emotions, sure, and teach yer wife to work at the dollar store to make extra money for Christmas gifts.

The answer is simple - build your $$$ pile, then play trying to be happy.

I know a couple people that lived their life always saving for tomorrow at the expense of today and tomorrow never came.

I’ve known several people who died within 5 years of retirement, was it worth it.

Different strokes, for different folks. Gotta have a balance

 

[txjustin]

I’m 42 and hopefully will be out of the corporate world within 5 years as my real estate investments overtake my salary.
I work behind a computer/s all day and it’s getting really old.
However, I appreciate that I can make 6 figures even if it’s not exactly fun…

I can’t imagine the thought of working a corporate job for 20 more years.


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[TheGrayRider]

You can always make more money but you cannot make more time.