keep the house after divorce? financial advisor?

[Billy Goat]

My advice from not being in this situation but seeing it a lot.

Hands down, get best lawyer before she does. Singles bar, hit up everyone in their 40's, know anything about a divorce lawyer? The most loved and most hated will be what you want, however if she already exited, won't surprise me if she has them on retainer already.



Once lawyer is retained, float a buy out price, enough that they think is enough to take and run, but that isn't splitting the value, if that's possible. That's dependent on the individual, how vested they were in things, and how green the grass is elsewhere.

 

[Ucsdryder]

Im not going to research HI but most states have alimony or child support not both.

Sometimes the easiest way to handle these things is just do nothing. Its easy to make bad decisions when emotions are running high.

One or the other? I got screwed!

Higher earner pays the other the difference in salary, usually for about half the time they were married.

Top earner makes 10k a month, other makes 5k a month, then the top earner would pay the spouse a portion of the difference monthly (40% or so I believe). Something about maintaining life style.

Then child support is on top of that. Alimony can be for 1/2 the time they were married, child support ends when the kid reaches 18.

This varies by state.

What I learned…it’s all a crock of BS. The bottom earner gets rewarded by dragging the divorce out as long as possible, alimony doesn’t start until divorce is final, plus it extends the length of marriage. Best thing he can do is wrap it up and move on, but she gets rewarded by dragging it out and both lawyers do too! A week before our court date all of a sudden all our differences were resolved and we settled in a day. Funny how that works!

In the end, it can be a good thing. Best thing that ever happened for me, and probably the kids.

 

[Billy Goat]

I hope the women who come here for gift ideas don't find this thread.

 

[KenLee]

He's consulted with a lawyer once or twice or something like that. I think since they've boh committed to the mediation he hasn't gone all in with the lawyer yet.

Thats not a risk I'd be willing to take, and I'm half crazy.
Multiple ex-wives would probably say it's a higher % of crazy than 50%.

 

[KenLee]

One or the other? I got screwed!

Higher earner pays the other the difference in salary, usually for about half the time they were married.

Top earner makes 10k a month, other makes 5k a month, then the top earner would pay the spouse a portion of the difference monthly (40% or so I believe). Something about maintaining life style.

Then child support is on top of that. Alimony can be for 1/2 the time they were married, child support ends when the kid reaches 18.

This varies by state.

What I learned…it’s all a crock of BS. The bottom earner gets rewarded by dragging the divorce out as long as possible, alimony doesn’t start until divorce is final, plus it extends the length of marriage. Best thing he can do is wrap it up and move on, but she gets rewarded by dragging it out and both lawyers do too! A week before our court date all of a sudden all our differences were resolved and we settled in a day. Funny how that works!

In the end, it can be a good thing. Best thing that ever happened for me, and probably the kids.

Yes sir. In the divorces I handle, I generally push everything towards a speedy resolution and the lawyer on other side gets pissed because they want to drag everything out and bill hourly to milk that $6-20k retainer.
I normally only do divorces for people I know. Usually 5ish a year.

 

[cnelk]

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again here….

The best thing that happened was when my wife changed her name to ‘Plaintiff’.

 

[KenLee]

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again here….

The best thing that happened was when my wife changed her name to ‘Plaintiff’.

You know why divorces are expensive?

 

[cnelk]

You know why divorces are expensive?

I do.
Because they are worth it!!!

 

[KenLee]

I do.
Because they are worth it!!!

Amen Brother!!!

 

[cnelk]

I will add, we did our divorce without a lawyer.
Filed all the paperwork, did what the Court said and in 90 days it was over.

We vowed to keep it civil and keep the kids as stable as possible.

Cost was $600

Was it easy? Nope.

 

[KenLee]

I will add, we did our divorce without a lawyer.
Filed all the paperwork, did what the Court said and in 90 days it was over.

We vowed to keep it civil and keep the kids as stable as possible.

Cost was $600

Was it easy? Nope.

Y'all were the exception and not the rule.
Out of everyone that tells me "oh we have everything worked out and agreed to" I'd say one in twenty works out that way.
Fights over pets or the old Chevy or Ford beater truck are common.

 

[svivian]

I always found the best deals on stuff from disgruntled ex wives

 

[Flatgo]

Reading through the comments one thing to keep in mind is that family law is extremely different in every state. Alimony child support, no fault, fault, child custody will all vary depending on the state and even district where it’s filed. That’s why a good lawyer ( not sure there is one) is worth the money. I guessing if she up and left this will not be civil.