House Poor

I had the Mrs read a couple of the responses. Let’s just say, she laughed and cringed at the same time. We bought our 1st home in 1989. Moved to our current home in 1985. As our income rose we looked around to upgrade several times. We said no, let’s just do some upgrades, stay put, have zero debt and I can retire at 60. That was 3 yrs ago. The Mrs has handled all the finances for 30 years, is a CPA and Comptroller. Yeah I feel pretty chill with her handling the finances no questions asked♥️ Never have been house poor.
I'd be pretty damned chill if I had that brainpower and earning power in a partner as well. You're a fortunate (and financially secure) man.
 
I've never been house poor, but we did have our first home paid off for 11 years. Decided to upgrade and the mortgage is much less than 25% of my take home(wife stays home). I guess I just don't like owing people money because I absolutely HATE seeing that mortgage payment every month.

I would never want to stretch my budget for a home, regardless of how bad I want it. Obviously a lot of guys feel differently and have a much higher debt tolerance. You just have to decide which one you are.

A side note - we looked at a couple acreages and decided that we didn't want to accrue all the extra drive time with running 4 kids around so we bought our new house in town.
 
Moved in 2017 and refi to 2.75 a few years later...glad I made the move then.

If I had to move now I'd get a fancy camper or motorhome and live real estate tax free on a small plot of unimproved land (minimal RE taxes) :)
 
Moved in 2017 and refi to 2.75 a few years later...glad I made the move then.

If I had to move now I'd get a fancy camper or motorhome and live real estate tax free on a small plot of unimproved land (minimal RE taxes) :)
That's what we're considering as well. Gotta get kiddos out of college and on their feet and then I'll have plenty more cash for payments.
 
Our dream is to buy some land (minimum 10 acres) and build a custom home. We currently live on the very outskirts of Indy but still in a neighborhood. Bought in 2020 and locked in a 3.0% interest rate, mortgage is $1800/month. Our household income has doubled since then but we have two kids in daycare and that is more than our mortgage every month. Our current plan is buy land and build in 4-6 years when the kids are out of daycare. Even though our financial situation has changed pretty dramatically (and God willing continue that trend) the plan scares the **** out of me. I grew up on beautiful little farm and want my kids to have some of the same experiences I got to have.
 
Our dream is to buy some land (minimum 10 acres) and build a custom home. We currently live on the very outskirts of Indy but still in a neighborhood. Bought in 2020 and locked in a 3.0% interest rate, mortgage is $1800/month. Our household income has doubled since then but we have two kids in daycare and that is more than our mortgage every month. Our current plan is buy land and build in 4-6 years when the kids are out of daycare. Even though our financial situation has changed pretty dramatically (and God willing continue that trend) the plan scares the **** out of me. I grew up on beautiful little farm and want my kids to have some of the same experiences I got to have.
Wanting the kids to have a good childhood is part of why I’m willing to be house poor and work harder right now. Wife works a few days per month and her and the kid (second one on the way) walk to the beach most days. My parents are a two minute walk and help with childcare, and get to be a big part of my kids life. When I’m off we’re fishing, hanging out at the beach, catching lizards, and making memories. And someday the kids will inherit some valuable property.
 
I truly feel for the few guys on this thread that think so little of their wife. I've been fortunate enough to be a great "earner" but never great at managing finances because of that earning ability. My wife came in after a few years of marriage and made changes to our household. I haven't stopped earning, but she sure has put our money to work! If I had the attitude of some of the men on this thread, we wouldn't be where we are today.
 
My house payment isn't bad at all. But between the insurance and property taxes it sucks. I pay them all separately. I dont think my loan is the norm. Seems like most have them all in one payment. But this year the taxes and insurance is more than the house payment
 
We're in the midst of putting our house on the market and relocating. It was my wife's 3rd house and my first.

We originally purchased back in 2017, have a mortgage or ballpark $1400/mo and have lived comfortably. We're coming out at about 200% gain on this house when we sell, which is awesome.

BUT, we're planning on moving to Pinedale, WY and house prices there don't seem to be commensurate with the locale. A 2500sqft home with a few acres, maybe 2-10 acres, just outside of town runs $650k-800k depending on specifics. Price goes down a bit if you get further from town, maybe 35 minutes. Our combined gross is probably $230-250k. I'm not exactly sure as my wife is the financial manager. I ignore all finances and just do my part to spend as much on tools and gear as she'll let me.

The quandary here is that we have a 5 year old that is super shy and we want her to have easy access to kids her own age to help makes some friends, I'd love in a neighborhood. I also want to have 10+ acres before it is no longer possible. I don't want to be slaving to make payments for higher prices land when she graduates highschool.

So.... Cheaper house in town now to drop our mortgage as much as possible, or get a plot and build outside of town, or go in between and get just a few acres and house in one of the "neighborhoods" just out of town that are higher priced?
 
Married almost 24 years and this August both kiddos will be gone to college, so here goes what me and my wife have learned. She stepped out of the education field to stay home with our children til one was in elementary school and the other in K4. Best 5.5 years she invested! Very fortunate to have a wife who willingly did this and loved almost every moment of it. We bought 10 acres and built a house just as we wanted 18 years ago (May 2008). It has served us well and the kids loved growing up out of town on some land. BUT.....now that they are moving out, what's next? We will downsize within the next 2 years, a house is a house is a house, dont become attached to it and let it become an anchor. Remove the emotion and make a sound business decision. Were we ever house poor, no, but can we become that way if we are not contentious? Yep.....be smart fellas, take ownership of your finances and be a good steward.........its very peaceful and liberating.
 
So.... Cheaper house in town now to drop our mortgage as much as possible, or get a plot and build outside of town, or go in between and get just a few acres and house in one of the "neighborhoods" just out of town that are higher priced?
Just put your kid in a sport or some other activity and make your house the "play" house or as is it with my 13 year stepson the "hangout" house. We live outside of town and my wifes 13 year old plays baseball, so he gets lots of friend time that way and we are the parents that are like "your friends are welcome here whenever and we will even go pick them up". living outside of town takes a little extra effort but not much.

Can't answer your whole question but maybe this will help. For what it's worth we live 25 minutes from his school.
 
My wife and I bought our first home in 2011 (bottom of the real estate market in our area) as a short sale and it was a bit of a stretch to make that payment and her student loans. But both of our earnings increased quickly and we paid off the student loans quickly. 8 years later we sold the house for double, used that money to build a custom home and only have a mortgage (sub 3%) for the land purchase, which will be paid off just before our oldest graduates high school. Timing was on our side fortunately.

There is no same answer for everyone, but we both knew that our earnings would increase and our original house payment would get easier. It paid off well for us, but I also know it doesn't always work out that well!
 
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