Going out of state and family priorities?

[brsnow]

Every kid is different.

 

[Backyard]

Spend the time to watch and support your kids first. You never get a "do-over".
If you miss it, it's gone.
The mountains will be there in a few years, and you might have a great hunting partner to boot.

 

[lif]

Depends on their age and importance of the event to them. My boy is 12 and getting ready to start his little league all star tournament. I will definitely not miss that because it represents hard work and accomplishment for him. Now if I had a good opportunity during his regular season to go on a trip,at the cost of missing a game or two, I would do that. And he probably wouldn’t care. Every kid is different at different ages. I will say that my parents rarely attended my games as a kid and missed most of my senior year of baseball while I was breaking my high schools records and in the end it did bother me. Not every parent involved in their kids sports wants scholarships and accolades for their kids, some just want to support their kids through any endeavor they face growing up. I will say this though, to each their own, but ultimately we should try to answer these questions before we have kids. For me personally, I try and be at everything I can for them, never in the way though. And in the end, my wife and I show our kids how to sacrifice for one another and I believe that gives me a little wiggle room when I miss a game or two. Good luck. Just remember, no 80 year old man will ever tell you, “I wish I would have spent less time with my kids”

 

[Beendare]

Just a question who here has kids that are very active in sports and still manages to make it out of state to hunt year to year or every other year? ...

I've been noticeably absent for some kids events in Bowhunting seasons.....the seasons are fixed and my kids know that.

I've worked hard and sacrificed a lot for my kids....they know that too. They don't begrudge me my one thing.....

...

 

[bozeman]

Who makes decisions in families today? The kids? I guess if someone has to ‘choose’ between family time or hunting, maybe the kids are better equipped to make decisions for the family...........

 

[brsnow]

Little boy blue and the man on the moon...

 

[idelkslayer]

Set your priorities.

I would say that your kids are most important but also that your kids are not the sport they play.

I see a lot of parents whose lives revolve around their kids sports and other extracurricular activities. Most weeknights and every weekend they are shuttling kids to and from various events. I think this gives kids the mistaken idea that life revolves around them and that their parents are just their own personal chaffeur.

I'm with the "one sport per year" crowd. Missing a game here and there is also OK. I want my kids to learn as much about life as they can before they leave and I think they will get that more by seeing and participating in household chores, budgeting, education and learning about different careers than playing sports non-stop.

 

[Antarctica]

it's about how you treat people, and how you act when no one is looking.

Man - that's some sage advice there. I'm gonna make sure I tell my kids that one day. Many thanks.

 

[fatlander]

Would I leave my wife at home with an infant and a toddler for two weeks to go gallivanting around in the mountains? No. Would I leave my wife at home for two weeks with those same kids anytime later down the road past those stages? Absolutely.

My dad pulled multiple long deployments while my brother and I were growing up and we turned out just fine. I’m not in anyway saying hunting trips should be viewed in the same as way as military deployments, I’m just saying that the wife and kids will be just fine for a couple weeks.

Your kids will probably think you’re cool because you went hunting for a couple weeks and you’re not the type of dad that’s at every single ball game screaming from the bleachers. . .


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[204guy]

Family comes first, but it's got it's limits. Putting off going hunting out west for 15 years cause you can't miss a couple games is crazy.

 

[Beendare]

Kids sports is so funny. ...great...but funny.

You get so wrapped up in it when they are little...and then how many kids actually play in College...or worse- the Pros?

Sports are so competitive around here its crazy. 60 boys trying out for the HS Freshman baseball team...and they are all good....REALLY GOOD. All have coaches on the side [some to the tune of $1600/mo] pony league teams, etc.

Its not like when I was in HS and could have made ANY of the varsity teams...things have changed.

I can tell you that a lot of these kids burn out at 16-18 years old. Just saw that with a couple friends graduating girl and boy. The boy could have played waterpolo at one of 3 schools...decided not to take any of them and stop playing. The girl had full ride offers for D1 soccer.

Every starter on our local girls HS Varsity soccer team has been offered a scholarship- for about the last 10 years straight. A bunch of those girls burn out and quit.

Q-Are you putting them in sports for them......or for you?

....

 

[brsnow]

I took the question by the OP of how to find a balance between your interests and the kids. It can be hard, especially if they don’t want to hunt. You certainly need your own time , I think it allows you to be a better person.

My interest is to see as much of what they enjoy to do as I can with balance. You get a sense of what is important to them. They grow up so fast.

 

[Rich M]

These days kids need sports and volunteer activities in order to qualify for ROTC (enter military as an officer) or to get into a decent college. So, folks need to include those activities as "important" for the child.

So what if you give up a season or two or three for your kids? Can't you hunt closer to home with the kids for a few years? It is all about priorities.

Little boy blue and the man on the moon...

 

[CX5Ranch]

We decided long ago that the chances of our kids actually making money in main stream sports is 1 in never. So we hunt and rodeo. They learn alot more doing these things anyway. And have an actual chance at making the NFR, or at least being extremely competitive.

I'm not big on telling the 5'8 slow white kid that if they practice hard enough they can play for golden state.

Reality sets in at some point. And with today's competitive youth leagues I believe we set most of them up for complete failure, especially when they've been told they were good against local competition their whole lives.

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[Clarence]

I have 3 young sons active with sports. Soccer season is during hunting season and I rarely make the games. I don’t shed hunt spring / summer or scout as much as I would like or go to the bar or whatever. I behave myself winter spring summer, but come fall my wife is a hunting widow.

^
I build good will and intentionally try to be a exceptional husband and father February through August. Burn up that good will during the long hunting season, and restart the process with a negative balance. But I am fortunate to have a wife and children that know what makes me tick. My kids are just starting to get close to hunting age and like to fish and hike. They love hearing stories of hunts. Balance is key though. Everyone's demands at work are different and that definitely plays into the whole equation. Time for family, time for hunting, and time for work. Be present and exceptional when it's home time.
Oh, and when you return home, act energized, not like you just got your butt handed to you by the mountain and are shot from a 1800 mile drive!

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[MarlinMark]

My kids will get more value out of a hunting/fishing trip than playing a game with a ball.
I will be attending every game or event minus the few weeks we are playing in the woods.

Same thing for missing school. They will not have perfect attendance because they will be with me in the middle of no where figuring out how to kill and eat something.

By the time they are busy enough to conflict with my hunting schedule they will be old enough that I will be hunting for/with them....so it will be "our" schedule.

If they do not want to hunt or fish...well then we will be doing some backpacking trips and I will be crying inside.

That's what I thought about my situation when I had two you boys on the ground. Brace yourself....

 

[Bozz]

Kids grow up once. Hunts happen every year.

 

[Dos Perros]

How can kids grow up with parents in their stuff all the time?

 

[Gagster7]

My kids are younger but because I didn’t have the time to go out for longer, I decided to go with an outfitter for my first out west trip.

 

[bozeman]

Please print out these thoughts and hang them in your nursing home room when your kids don’t visit 6 months out of the year.........