I don't have kids, so I can't relate on that level, but my marriage was similar.
Maybe a counselor would help, maybe not. If you want to put in effort there are a lot of things you could try, including a counselor.
I went through a similar situation minus the SH deal, but my ex-wife accused me of cheating on her multiple times. I spent $$$$$ on counseling for me, for her, for us, couples retreats, I invited her to church with me, changed friends, changed gyms I worked out at. I even approached her with the person she thought I was cheating on her with (ex best friend of hers), with everything I did to prove to her I didn't cheat, she just wouldn't believe me.
A marriage is only worth fighting for if both people want to fight for it.
I was mentally and physically exhausted trying to fight for my marriage and in the end, she didn't want it. Once the papers were filed by her, I finally gave up. I focused on getting myself healthy and happy again. 1 month before our divorce was final she was calling me to meet up, to help her, to go to a counselor, to try again, but I had mentally and physically checked out.
I'm re-married to an amazing woman and life is great! We complement each other well. She's my #1 priority, there are those tough days occasionally, but I wouldn't change a thing.
Marriage is hard, but is amazing when it's with the right person.
I think both of you need to take some time to figure out what you both REALLY want, life is too short to be unhappy.
Best of luck to you and to your wife, things can get better once you know what path you're going down.
Maybe a counselor would help, maybe not. If you want to put in effort there are a lot of things you could try, including a counselor.
I went through a similar situation minus the SH deal, but my ex-wife accused me of cheating on her multiple times. I spent $$$$$ on counseling for me, for her, for us, couples retreats, I invited her to church with me, changed friends, changed gyms I worked out at. I even approached her with the person she thought I was cheating on her with (ex best friend of hers), with everything I did to prove to her I didn't cheat, she just wouldn't believe me.
A marriage is only worth fighting for if both people want to fight for it.
I was mentally and physically exhausted trying to fight for my marriage and in the end, she didn't want it. Once the papers were filed by her, I finally gave up. I focused on getting myself healthy and happy again. 1 month before our divorce was final she was calling me to meet up, to help her, to go to a counselor, to try again, but I had mentally and physically checked out.
I'm re-married to an amazing woman and life is great! We complement each other well. She's my #1 priority, there are those tough days occasionally, but I wouldn't change a thing.
Marriage is hard, but is amazing when it's with the right person.
I think both of you need to take some time to figure out what you both REALLY want, life is too short to be unhappy.
Best of luck to you and to your wife, things can get better once you know what path you're going down.