Traditional vs Elope

cnelk

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Mar 1, 2012
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Colorado
I did both... hahaha

First was traditional, second was elope.

Elope or just go down to the local JP and get married, then have a reception if you want.

You'll be saving yourself a lot of money and you wont see your wife become a 'Bridezilla'
 
Joined
Dec 7, 2014
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If I had it to do over again I would "hybrid". Do a small cheap ceremony with close family and friends. DJ's are obsolete if you have spotify and know how to make a playlist, just rent some speakers if needed. Lots of times if you are a member of a church they will let you get married there for free, or find a community center or something inexpensive. Heck, you can have the reception in a field with folding tables and tablecloths if the weather is right. PIzza, a food truck, or just a small local business to cater and you are GTG.

We live in the middle of a very popular area for wedding venues and the prices some couples pay for their weddings are just astronomical. We probably spent more than we should have on ours as well, but no way I would pay 10k+ for just a venue.

Weddings are fun. If your bride has no expectations, then maybe eloping is a good option for you, but I think had we not had a wedding at all my wife would wish we did or at least wonder what it would have been like. Lot's of this is going to be dependant on your stage of life, your relationship, and your family.
 
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Elope. Weddings are just a party for your guests to eat and get drunk on your dime. My wife and I got married on a frozen lake surrounded by snow covered mountains with just immediate family and a couple really close friends then went out to dinner. Way less stress and saved a pile of money.
 

Ucsdryder

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Jan 24, 2015
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The 2 of us, the dog, and a preacher on the top of a mountain.


I don't regret it at all, weddings turn into a show and that's not what it's supposed be about.
Done it twice. First time was a big party, what an effing waste. Second time was the same as above, except preacher was my dad. I still feel stupid for the big wedding…
 

svivian

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Mar 16, 2016
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Colorado
We eloped and still agree it was the best decision we made.

We rented an Airbnb that slept 16 people. Had the ceremony in the back yard and still had the usual ceremony.

Two weeks later we had a party at the in-laws property and did a lot of it ourselves and saved a ton. We still have people telling us it was one of the most fun wedding parties they have been to.
 

TaperPin

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Jul 12, 2023
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Kids all love weird elaborate Pinterest weddings now - it’s exhausting. When we decided to get hitched the best thing we did is take off to Las Vegas and have Elvis marry us. Our wedding photos look just like these - this was fun and we still laugh looking at the pics. I bought a nice velvet suit, and the wife went all out on a really nice dress. Lol

These places have the system down - they pick you up in a limo, there’s a quick walk through, Elvis starts singing one of the three songs, the deed is done, and you’re returned in the same limo.

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Last edited:
Joined
Sep 6, 2022
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Elope. Have a party (reception) after the fact and invite people the extended family. I did this with my wife. we married on the beach at sunset and had a party after with some food and cake. this cost us around $3000 while a buddy of mine got married the same year and had a traditional wedding. His cost was closer to $21,000.
 

Rotnguns

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Apr 11, 2020
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Southwest Idaho
My wife and I got married by a magistrate judge in Canyon County, Idaho without telling anyone. The judge joked that it was refreshing to see a couple close to his age for once (I was 54, my wife was 56). We'd been together for about 15 years before; neither of us wanted the commotion and expense of planning and implementing a formal rehearsal and wedding. Our mothers and a few family members on both sides were mildly annoyed, as were our friends who would have declared Party On had they known. Looking back ten years after, we don't regret our decision.
 

Jsmalls273

Lil-Rokslider
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Jan 13, 2021
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Me and my bride went to the courthouse. Judge did a phenomenal job and we only spend $185! Then went and had a great dinner and drinks at a restaurant with our families. We were star of the show at the Texas Roadhouse in my suit and her in her wedding dress! I wouldn't change it!

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Joined
Jan 22, 2016
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Missoula, MT
We had a traditional wedding but i think we would have been happy eloping too. For how expensive weddings are, I’d elope and save the money. If i remember right our wedding costed 12-14k in 2018 and was basic. About 80 people. Didn’t have to pay for a venue, rented couple tents and chairs/tables, did go all out on the food. Beer and wine only. The tent/tables/chairs, and food were by far the most expensive part.


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thinhorn_AK

"DADDY"
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Jul 2, 2016
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Alaska
Me and my wife got married without really telling anybody. I was living overseas at the time and met my wife there, we’d been together for 2 or 3 years when we got hitched.

I had to go to the us embassy and file paperwork, we then had to go get a marriage permit from the city my wife was born in. It was pretty much just paperwork.

About a month later we rented out this whole restaraunt and had like 40 of her family members and a dozen of my friends get together, it was pretty fun, the shower in our apartment was broken that day so I buzzed my head so I’d look ok for her family.

About a year after that I had a ring made with a diamond that had been passed down in my family, I gave it to her at some fancy Italian restaurant in Los Angeles.

That was like 13 years ago now….holy shit.
 
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Coeur d' Alene, ID
If it’s your first, go traditional and have fun with family and friends. Second, third, ect. just elope and stop wasting your money ;)

On a serious note, I am looking forward to my daughter’s wedding and WILL be walking her down the aisle and having that dance with her, if her fiancé has a problem with it, he’s not the right guy for her.
 

TaperPin

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Jul 12, 2023
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It’s kind of funny, we know a couple that eloped last weekend in Vegas and they still haven’t told anyone.

It makes me wonder how many folks get married and simply don’t change her last name or wear rings, and we all simply assume they are dating.
 

hunt1up

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Mar 2, 2012
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Central Illinois
We did traditional. Mid priced but still the whole usual deal. We both say we would just elope or so something small in hindsight. We spent the whole reception talking to people and barely spent time together, which is the whole point right?
 

NRA4LIFE

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Nov 20, 2016
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washington
My wife and I paid for our entire wedding in 1993 and spent $25K or better. My buddy a couple years later got married at the courthouse, bought a couple kegs of bear ang got 'er done for about 100 bucks. You choose.
 

cnelk

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Colorado
On a serious note, I am looking forward to my daughter’s wedding and WILL be walking her down the aisle and having that dance with her, if her fiancé has a problem with it, he’s not the right guy for her.

It’s something you will never forget ;)



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tuffcity

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Nov 2, 2013
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YT
In the words of the Steve Miller Band... "Take the Money and Run". A do-over would be an elope. And the Mrs agrees.

That being said, my daughter went the quasi trad route. Small wedding at our place, friends bar tending, I put together a plywood dance floor on the lawn, and more friends ran the BBQ and her mother in law (a territorial judge) married them. I paddled her down the "aisle".

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