On being a flake

[kloppy]

What gets me is the new guys who claim that they want to hunt, spend $$ on gear/licenses, and still flake when me or my hunting partners offer to bring them out. Have heard every excuse in the book, but when its go time, guys are just not willing to wake up at 3 am or suffer in the cold.

As for the other flakers, there is nothing better than sending a pic of a grip and grin to the guy who flaked.

 

[GSPHUNTER]

HA HA HA, Mike just called and wants me to book a five day fishing trip with him in December.

 

[GetWestern]

Trying to find a reliable hunting partner sometimes feels more difficult than finding a spouse IMO, especially backcountry hunting when things are a lot more intense and uncomfortable. I’ve had quite of few different hunting partners over the years they seem to come and go just cause life gets in the way, they have kids or lose interest. The best way to filter these people out is see if they can be reliable long before you want to go on a hunt with them. The only thing that you can count on is yourself.

 

[Dalen88]

I hear ya man. I agree with the above saying that some people think they are more hardcore or into than they are and love talking about it but when it comes for go time they are no show or the ghost you. I mostly just hunt by myself now but after having to shoot a charging grizzly last year im a little more jumpy. I trained my new new lab pup (1.5 years old now) to be my hunting partner, shes always game to get out and doesnt hit snooze haha.

 

[11boo]

Same as most, too many flakes so I usually go solo.

One guy, I know I can count on to always be there and ready was a random hookup from a different hunting forum.

 

[Mule3006Elk]

Following.

It's Poser mixed in with Bravado. Some talk the talk, when it's game time, they can only finish the 1st quarter. Some can't even do that. It's ok. Not everyone is designed to be a back country hunter. I'm okay with that. Less competition. The more I've hunted the more I go solo. It's gets old listening to the same tune or excuses: work, busy, projects, etc. OR the myriad of reasons why someone can't get in shape for a hunt. If they do show up it's a pain in the ass because I'm always waiting or I have to significantly slow down my natural pace. I'm glassing and they're not. I'm critical thinking my way through the hunt and they follow you around like a shadow.

Solo is way easier IMHO until the pack out.

 

[MuleyFever]

I have never had a hunting partner other than when my wife goes. Getting older and would love to find a good hunting buddy but finding someone with the same points that can draw the same tags is difficult. Then add in the mentioned poor reliability of another person and it becomes nearly impossible to find someone.

 

[Geewhiz]

I've been through this as well. Seams the only person that I can count on being there every time is my old man. He's good company, helps call, decoy, and pack, and never carries a tag in his pocket. Seams that you can't find a better hunting partner than that. I really value our time and memories made in the hills.

 

[Poser]

Not hunting related, but I have one buddy, and I genuinely like the guy: he’s a good guy to know in general. I’ve known him for about 3 years, but we actually have a climbing partner in common from back 20 years ago and that partner in common was legit, so I assume the same would apply. Anyway, this guy…. You mention possibly doing anything and he’s like, “I am there, man! 100% in.” He’s even sent me pics of him loading his car the night before and he still will bail the next morning. It’s kind of laughable. I wouldn’t give anyone else that pass, he’s always my last resort partner option and I always have a back up solo plan. He bails a solid 50% of the time and he has no excuse: no wife, adult son, works in the finance sector so no work commitments outside of market hours.

 

[GSPHUNTER]

Not hunting related, but I have one buddy, and I genuinely like the guy: he’s a good guy to know in general. I’ve known him for about 3 years, but we actually have a climbing partner in common from back 20 years ago and that partner in common was legit, so I assume the same would apply. Anyway, this guy…. You mention possibly doing anything and he’s like, “I am there, man! 100% in.” He’s even sent me pics of him loading his car the night before and he still will bail the next morning. It’s kind of laughable. I wouldn’t give anyone else that pass, he’s always my last resort partner option and I always have a back up solo plan. He bails a solid 50% of the time and he has no excuse: no wife, adult son, works in the finance sector so no work commitments outside of market hours.

He got a better offer from a hot babe.

 

[danwattsmessick]

I had one friend I could count on, no matter what, for anything. Want to hunt? He'd be on the road. Fish? He'd buy the beer. Need something heavy moved? No questions asked. Best friend and hunting partner you could have.

After a divorce he moved back to his home state and I have yet to find anyone who can replace him.

 

[idahohuntr]

I can definitely count on one hand the number of reliable, good hunting partners I've had over the years. On the flip side, I always try hard to be that good hunting partner for others, knowing what its like to be disappointed in others.

 

[JeffP_Or]

Agree this has always been a thing - but it does seem more common of late and related to more than just the life change issues. I believe partially there is a desire for not only immediate gratification [social media etc] but also publication/socialization of what you're doing [social media again] that has people enjoying TALKING about doing things more than actually DOING those things; once they realize how much work might be involved or something else more interesting [in the immediate term] comes up - off they go.
Everyone seems to have these images of the ideal trip and if it appears that the trip will not meet those levels of expectation, they'd rather go do something more likely to fulfill their anticipated level of reward. Even if that is vegging on the couch.
Sometimes - not always - getting together for planning and packing coordination etc will get them more invested early on and keep them interested; sometimes, as noted, nothing works.
Or yeah - the last minute hot babe/stud thing...

 

[Geewhiz]

Agree this has always been a thing - but it does seem more common of late and related to more than just the life change issues. I believe partially there is a desire for not only immediate gratification [social media etc] but also publication/socialization of what you're doing [social media again] that has people enjoying TALKING about doing things more than actually DOING those things; once they realize how much work might be involved or something else more interesting [in the immediate term] comes up - off they go.
Everyone seems to have these images of the ideal trip and if it appears that the trip will not meet those levels of expectation, they'd rather go do something more likely to fulfill their anticipated level of reward. Even if that is vegging on the couch.
Sometimes - not always - getting together for planning and packing coordination etc will get them more invested early on and keep them interested; sometimes, as noted, nothing works.
Or yeah - the last minute hot babe/stud thing...

Very well put. I have noticed more and more people like the idea of doing things more than doing the actual things.

 

[CCooper]

I think there are a lot of folks in the same boat on here. I have a hunting partner that is as solid as they come and my best friend to boot. I am 36, married with no kids and a wife that supports my hunting addiction 100%. Partner is married with 3 kids and a wifey that doesn't really look at it the same as mine, but it is time away from family for them and I certainly understand it. I get all weekends between Aug-Nov + 4 solid weeks of vacation to donate to hunting and scouting. His time spent getting to hunt has shrunk the last couple years, my drive and time to hunt has elevated 2-folds. We are always honest with one another, His oldest boy drew a really nice youth elk tag this season, and he will be focusing on that this year- which is awesome! I offered to tag along and help spot and pack meat as much as I could- this will also be quality scouting time for me. I will most likely be spending most of my archery season solo this year (which is a 1st for me), but he knows he always has shotgun and a cot in the tent anytime he can come. I think as we all get a little older people's priorities change and they drift to and away from certain things. I am just not as into fishing as I was 5 years ago, still really like to go, but would rather spend time in the woods than on the river or lake. It will always be tough to find a partner that is on your level when your level is changing. I see the advantages to hunting solo; extending trips, spur of the moment decision/ changes, but I will sure miss the comradery during archery season- but we do have an Idaho deer hunt planned this year. We have always had a great time hunting together and had a lot of success. I will be positive and look at it as a new challenge.

To add to the comments above, I have invited a lot of people fishing (never hunting) over the years- when people respond "maybe" to an invite, this pisses me off. A "I'll check with the wife" I can understand. "Maybe" to me sounds like your in unless to figure out something better to do, and I just assume your a flake.

If you cancel last minute you wont be invited again
If your late it tells me you don't value my time and you won't be invited again- I will leave without you
if you no-show you are a piece of shit- and ex-communicado

I was taught early is on time, and on time is late.

When I say I'll be there- I will.

 

[zion zig zag]

Hunting, backcountry skiing and climbing. I have a handful of people that I know to call that I trust. If you can't show up at the trailhead at the agreed upon time then I sure as hell can't trust you to get me out of a bad situation when needed.

I'm lucky to have two sons that fit this role. But I had to get on them a few times when they were younger. 5am start time means you are ready to hike at 5am. Not start lacing boots and putting stuff in your pack. They were laughing at a family bbq the other day about times I've ripped into them for seemingly small infractions. But I know they secretly appreciate it.

 

[JeffRaines]

To add to the comments above, I have invited a lot of people fishing (never hunting) over the years- when people respond "maybe" to an invite, this pisses me off. A "I'll check with the wife" I can understand. "Maybe" to me sounds like your in unless to figure out something better to do, and I just assume your a flake.

If you cancel last minute you wont be invited again
If your late it tells me you don't value my time and you won't be invited again- I will leave without you
if you no-show you are a piece of shit- and ex-communicado

I was taught early is on time, and on time is late.

When I say I'll be there- I will.

This is where im at as well.

If it’s something like fishing, look I get it, shit comes up. If you cancel, whatever, but at least contact me and cancel… not just ghost me when it’s time to finalize and then have the nerve to contact me a week or so later.

Like you mentioned, we’re adults and we have shit to do. I have to make time to do things - when people pull this shit I take it as highly disrespectful.

Im the same - when I say I’ll be there, I will be there early and ready to go.

 

[CorbLand]

I have noticed this and tell my wife all the time that I feel like I am the only person I know that actually follows through with what I say I will do. I am married with no kids and a good chunk of my friends do have kids. I do understand that kids add another factor that I dont have to worry about but I think they become an excuse, same with wives.

The best advice I ever got before getting married was "you don't ask your wife permission to do anything." I tell this to all of my friends that are getting married and it is amazing to see the difference in the ones that dont versus those that do.

I always ask my wife "do we/you have anything Wednesday night?" If the answer is "No" then I respond with "I am going scouting/hunting that night then."

My problem is I absolutely hate hunting alone.

 

[JeffRaines]

I have noticed this and tell my wife all the time that I feel like I am the only person I know that actually follows through with what I say I will do. I am married with no kids and a good chunk of my friends do have kids. I do understand that kids add another factor that I dont have to worry about but I think they become an excuse, same with wives.

The best advice I ever got before getting married was "you don't ask your wife permission to do anything." I tell this to all of my friends that are getting married and it is amazing to see the difference in the ones that dont versus those that do.

I always ask my wife "do we/you have anything Wednesday night?" If the answer is "No" then I respond with "I am going scouting/hunting that night then."

My problem is I absolutely hate hunting alone.

Even with kids it’s not impossible to make and follow through with plans.

Me and my wife have an understanding - during the winter and spring it’s mostly her time, I’ll do what I can to accommodate her plans. Summer is a mixture of both of us, and late summer/fall is mine and she does what she can to accommodate my plans.

With that said, I think a lot of peoples problem is that they “commit” to plans before actually doing their due diligence… or they overcommit in general and then when Saturday rolls around after working 50 hours they’re tired… big surprise dude you’re always tired after working that long - could you not foresee this? Because I sure as hell can and I commit accordingly.

 

[Jesse Jaymes]

It's not just hunting. It's Life. There are soooo many Flakey people in this World. My son just turned 21 and I've tried to explain to him that dudes talk so much schitt in the bar over drinks. Everyone plans to rule the world and fill trucks with gold and B&C heads...yet they always disappoint.

I Waterfowl most of my fall when not chasing big game. And I've offered to take some co workers and "friends". It's very true that the 0300 alarm bell weeds out 90% of the Takers. The thermometer weeds out the other 9%. Only the Montana raised guys rise to the Bell and Show.