My One-and-Only Son, yesterday....

[Roger17]

A colleague's son recently enlisted Air Force and is going cyber signals. He's about to graduate training and get his first duty station in either S. Korea or Maryland. He chose that route due to interest in it and a huge employment upside after service. As a dad, I can understand some nerves, but also how proud of him you must be. Good luck to your son in whatever route he goes.

 

[lyle_destroys]

Does he have a girlfriend?

 

[Laelkhunter]

Does he have an idea of what he wants to do? His MOS or "job"? I wish someone had sat down with me (outside of the recruiter) and talked through my MOS choices. Might be something you can help him with...

Yea, some recruiters tell them, "Yea you can be just like Tom Cruise in Top Gun-sign right here." Then they find themselves painting rocks on the roadside. And don't forget to paint the bottom of the rock.

 

[TheGDog]

Does he have a girlfriend?

No. Which surprises me, because I was constantly "on-the-hunt" at his age.

But I figure that's a good thing he's not paired up with anybody since he's gonna go into the service.

 

[lyle_destroys]

No. Which surprises me, because I was constantly "on-the-hunt" at his age.

But I figure that's a good thing he's not paired up with anybody since he's gonna go into the service.

I was going to suggest talking to him about really thinking about what could be to come if he did, just the future in general. My old man told me straight up I should probably go in not having a girlfriend, I sometimes wish I would have listened lol

 

[RockAndSage]

But I figure that's a good thing he's not paired up with anybody since he's gonna go into the service.

Yes, it absolutely is a good thing.

I clearly remember my own ongoing gratitude in Basic at not having a GF, after seeing a dozen guys around me get absolutely crushed, brutally, with Dear John letters, one at a time over the weeks. It's a uniquely bad experience in that context, as almost everyone talks openly about their girlfriends back home, and everyone else has an idea of what that person means to them. Even the ones who didn't get a breakup letter were distracted with thoughts of that aspect of home, rather than being fully mentally present. Entering the military is a much better experience when going in focused on getting the most out of the training, and becoming the best version of yourself you can be, in that short phase of life. Mindset is everything.

 

[Loo.wii]

No. Which surprises me, because I was constantly "on-the-hunt" at his age.

But I figure that's a good thing he's not paired up with anybody since he's gonna go into the service.

Write him letters. Take all the pictures you can. Get him some good luggage and a leatherman. Remind him of his humanity, even if he is remotely extinguishing someones life from 1000s of miles away it will have an impact on his conscience. Regardless of how you touch war, war will touch you back hard.

Substance abuse of all varieties is present in the military. From dipping sanitizing swabs to clearing bottles of niquil to sleep just make sure he manages his stress and mental health in a healthy way.

 

[doc holiday13]

But, I've been trying to console myself with the thought that, he's got my genes in him, so they'll know from his ASVABS (sp?) he's not stupid, and he's on the slim, string-bean (water-polo players body type) side... so I'm pretty sure they'll see that he is of greatest use in some other kind of role besides combat.

I think its better if he knows how smart he is and is he choosing a military career path that compliments that. Lots of good opportunity if he chooses the right MOS and leverages his relationship with different guys.

 

[lyle_destroys]

Ya know man, the more I think about it, the more I see what I said was a little shortsighted. Or probably a lot. I think the advice I have for him and all men is to find a lifestyle that you’re happy in and then find someone that is more similar to that. Considerations for the other person be known, I see a lot of men my age being very unhappy with their choices and being unwilling to change their decisions.

 

[TheGDog]

Write him letters. Take all the pictures you can. Get him some good luggage and a leatherman. Remind him of his humanity, even if he is remotely extinguishing someones life from 1000s of miles away it will have an impact on his conscience. Regardless of how you touch war, war will touch you back hard.

Substance abuse of all varieties is present in the military. From dipping sanitizing swabs to clearing bottles of niquil to sleep just make sure he manages his stress and mental health in a healthy way.

Thankfully, in that Regard... since I learned when becoming a Parent... that the chance for your kid becoming an alcoholic... becomes GREATLY increased if they manage to consume alcohol before like age 15 or something, they were WAY more likely to have issues with it later in life.


Well, that struck deep for me. So I never did any of that stuff of letting him have a try of something I might be electing to have. And I'd always tell him "Meh... You wouldn't like it anyway." Then I'd let him smell my drink. That usually made his nose crinkle but good. (hehe)

And thankfully... so far so good! His ASVABS were great, like I assumed they'd be... so He's basically got the choice of any job the Air Force offers. And he's got his Eagle Scout Rank, so he starts at an E3.

So I've explained to him how he has to think about the Job type he goes for and if he can see that role leading to upward increasing mobility/responsibility, and something he can possibly then transfer over into civilian life and continue on with an upward path? Explaining to him ya probably don't wanna key-hole yourself into a role that's very niche and people wouldn't see how the skillset translates well to anything else. That sorta thing.

 

[TheGDog]

Ya know man, the more I think about it, the more I see what I said was a little shortsighted. Or probably a lot. I think the advice I have for him and all men is to find a lifestyle that you’re happy in and then find someone that is more similar to that. Considerations for the other person be known, I see a lot of men my age being very unhappy with their choices and being unwilling to change their decisions.

Thankfully it sounds like he's jumping on the increasingly popular bandwagon among young men of today, of work on making best version of self first and get your financial situation at least on a path, THEN... later.. consider adding a significant other into the mix.

 

[TheGDog]

Brotha, I've just gotten older, after 2 full knee replacements, 2 shoulders operated on, my gallbladder taken out, prostate rootered, I'm simply not part billygoat any longer. I've had a difficult time adjusting to it. I can tell you, limitations suck. But I'm kind of learning to adjust. In short, when he's back, do not let him walk you into the ground. Last thing, I remember you doing pretty damn well on our excursions, and you definitely sucked in a ton of information, at light-speed.

I was reviewing this thread this evening and OMG..Ugh.. I read where you wrote " you definitely sucked in a ton of information"..

And it made me Cringe thinking about the last 3 days at work Man. Oof. Wooo you have NO EARTHLY IDEA man!

Me and AI? We've been hooked together like Neo and The Matrix with the spike in the back of the head, HaHA!

Like seriously.. y'day? It wasn't until my VPN connection did it's customary 11th hour of login security disconnect... that I realized I hadn't eaten or drank anything except that first morning cup of coffee at 7:40am! I'd been fueled by pure anxiety and frustration and dread and determination the whole damn day. Ugh.

And it's likely gonna be somewhat this way from now until the end of the year. I've got at least 4 major "spinning plates" on sticks I'm having to alternate putting my attentions on, rotating to the next one whenever you hit a roadblock ya gotta wait on for the other ones.

Right now it's like I'm clawing my way out of a pretty bad hole, work-wise. But I know it won't get better until I can get myself over the other side of it. So in those moment... I envision in my mind's eye Ryan Reynolds in the Role of Dead Pool... shouting out "This one's Gonna Require... MAXIMUM... EFFORT!!!...."

 

[Loo.wii]

Thankfully, in that Regard... since I learned when becoming a Parent... that the chance for your kid becoming an alcoholic... becomes GREATLY increased if they manage to consume alcohol before like age 15 or something, they were WAY more likely to have issues with it later in life.


Well, that struck deep for me. So I never did any of that stuff of letting him have a try of something I might be electing to have. And I'd always tell him "Meh... You wouldn't like it anyway." Then I'd let him smell my drink. That usually made his nose crinkle but good. (hehe)

And thankfully... so far so good! His ASVABS were great, like I assumed they'd be... so He's basically got the choice of any job the Air Force offers. And he's got his Eagle Scout Rank, so he starts at an E3.

So I've explained to him how he has to think about the Job type he goes for and if he can see that role leading to upward increasing mobility/responsibility, and something he can possibly then transfer over into civilian life and continue on with an upward path? Explaining to him ya probably don't wanna key-hole yourself into a role that's very niche and people wouldn't see how the skillset translates well to anything else. That sorta thing.

Glad to hear it. Im very much Pro tech, anything that touches the bleeding edge of, Cyber AI, emerging tech, etc. The payoff in that realm is absolutely insane once you convert. Theres a mil tech AI company out of NOR cal paying upwards of 200 as a civilian. Heres a really good career exercise that you both may find beneficial. Pick out a list of his top 5 AF career fields and then map those directly to mid/late career positions filtering for salary and remote/location. Once you do that you will be able to build a road map of when to get out and what experiences to push for in the military. For example say his options are cyber and intel. A cyber operator can make anywhere between 120-400 reasonably while an intel analyst can make between 100-200. In either career field getting our between 5-10 years is the sweet spot in terms of experience:salary:youth. These career options also tend to have much more opportunity for training directly applicable to civilans in addition to special milpay and special assignments. This strategy worked exceptionally well for me and hopefully you find value in it.


Good luck.

 

[mtwarden]

Have him be a little hesitant on the recruiter steering him in the right direction. They actually get bonuses when they direct someone in a field/career that is under subscribed.

If he did good on the ASVAB's it should open up almost all career fields.