Getting Married and Hunting

[Where's Bruce?]

Marriage isn't hard if you're just honest. If you can't say "Honey, during a few times of the year I'm gonna load a backpack up with gear and leave for a 1-3 weeks to enjoy the outdoors alone and you're just going to have to accept that and be okay with it if this relationship has any chance of working out..." then don't marry that gal. A woman just needs to know what she's getting into...be up front and if she walks, she walks. There are things you don't have to compromise on providing you explain it to her first. Her reaction will tell you everything you need to know. As for kids, a good dad knows when they must come first so that's a non-issue.

 

[16Bore]

“Kevin Dill”....you’ve said it all...

 

[Ridge Ghost]

40+ years married to the only wife I'll ever have. I have often said a good marriage is like a braided stream. No matter how many times you're apart, you are ultimately on the same journey....and it's the journey that counts. I'm not going to tell anyone how to make it work in terms of a marriage and one's love of hunting and fishing.

I wouldn't marry a woman who put me second to her favorite interests in life.

A great marriage is far more rewarding than a great hunting and fishing life.

I'd rather be with who I love than doing what I love, and I tell her that often.

The best trophy room is still a lifeless place full of unseeing eyes.

A trophy wife is not my goal. Making her feel that way occasionally is great.

I don't recommend thinking you can manage a wife, a marriage and hunting.

Marry well, and the right things will happen. Have faith in that. You'll hunt.

She doesn't have to be your best friend when you get married.

You'll be wise to make her your best friend before one of you dies.

It's her life too. Give her more rainbows than rain.

Great stuff right here

 

[Ownthewest]

Congrats. Spending time with the wife on hunts or scouting trips is always a blast. However, I have learned over time that I usually have to tone done the intensity of the trips when she is along. Best of luck.

 

[Bsnyder]

I'm lucky I was always a bird hunter, my wife told that hunting ducks and geese was balding so she got me bookies on big game now we hunt 3 to 4 weeks a year chasing big game in our three years of marriage she has killed 4 antelope and 4 deer, but we shed hunt together, fish together, so our vacations are either scouting for bucks or fly fishing her trip this year is a week in florida. Ps my wife never hunted before she met me 6 years ago, so how got the better end of the deal, I'm not sure I even care I'm just blessed my wife loves what I do. Congrats on one of the best experiences I've ever had.

 

[pdxmatt]

40+ years married to the only wife I'll ever have. I have often said a good marriage is like a braided stream. No matter how many times you're apart, you are ultimately on the same journey....and it's the journey that counts. I'm not going to tell anyone how to make it work in terms of a marriage and one's love of hunting and fishing.

I wouldn't marry a woman who put me second to her favorite interests in life.

A great marriage is far more rewarding than a great hunting and fishing life.

I'd rather be with who I love than doing what I love, and I tell her that often.

The best trophy room is still a lifeless place full of unseeing eyes.

A trophy wife is not my goal. Making her feel that way occasionally is great.

I don't recommend thinking you can manage a wife, a marriage and hunting.

Marry well, and the right things will happen. Have faith in that. You'll hunt.

She doesn't have to be your best friend when you get married.

You'll be wise to make her your best friend before one of you dies.

It's her life too. Give her more rainbows than rain.

Loved the perspective Kevin! I married an amazing woman I love and respect, and we both treat each other that way in whatever conversations we have. We can navigate kids, finances, and hunting; as long we work on it together.

 

[Charon]

A lot of thing people don't understand about relationship.

1. she doesn't have to like everything you like e.g Hunting
.2 she doesn't have to know about what you spend on hunting and shooting, so as you are taking care of the bills you are supposed to.
.3 you don't check how many purses she has and you doesn't count how guns or ammo you have or buy on a regular.

Buddie you'll be fine.

 

[fngTony]

On the financial side make sure to have a nest egg and don’t dip into it for hunting. I’m talking about a fund for unexpected car repairs, doctor bills, etc this is even more important if you have kids.

My wife has a degree in accounting yet forgets some of the annual expenses like car registration, home maintenance. Thing is to not fight over this little stuff, your conversations should be a check and balance with each other.

The old “I buy this, she buys that at our own discretion” can be trouble. When a $2000 scope shows up and you just discussed saving for a vacation, home remodel, etc...I would be pissed too.

 

[30338]

Kevin Dill said it way better than me. Married 30 years with two high achieving kids. Life is great. And I hunt a bit along the way.

 

[stephenk22]

Happy wife, happy life.
If you started hunting before you got married, that will go a long ways. I got married and then became a hunter, unfortunately for my wife!
Best advice is to make sure your house is in order before you leave to hunt. It's hard to enjoy your hunt when you know there is tension back home.

 

[Dtharvester]

Get married in the off-season so an anniversary doesn’t get in the way of big hunts (already successful there). Everything else with consideration, and in moderation.

 

[Scottyboy]

My hunting increased after marriage (not sure if my wife wanted me gone, or....?). Then our twins came and maybe hunted a total of 10 days in the first 2 years, which was my own doing. Things are slowly starting to ramp back up but I think it will be a while before it was like years past...and understandably so.

 

[idig4au]

I’ve been on both sides of the fence. It’s not greener on the other side

I’ve been in a humbling fantastic relationship where I didn’t get to hunt as much as I wanted, but got to share life, felt whole as a person and got do things together that were meaningful and provided fulfillment. Having support, adoration, and love is priceless. That’s what life is about.

And I’ve been single with absolute freedom to do as I please, including multiple mountains hunts each year around the world, buying customs guns and having the best of the best. Essential living a selfish bachelor’s dream life. And this was after my relationship. Nice to have a impressive trophy room but at the end of the day, but it’s nothing but memories that only I can relate to. Can’t take any of it with me, including the memories. I don’t regret creating the memories.

I’ll take being in a relationship any day. Life is meant to be shared. Life is about self growth. Find the right person that makes your day brighter, makes you want to be a better person, learn the art of compromise and being selfless and you’ll find that dreams and passions will be shared and supported.

 

[menhaden_man]

I'm getting married this summer, August 10th. I may be getting "tied down", but I'm pretty darn excited about it!

I want to hear your experiences and advice/tips to navigate a hobby requiring much time and financial commitment while starting a life together.
She isn't a hunter, but loves to hike and camp and be outside. So, I can double dip on a summer scouting trip and getting backpacking gear, etc.

Hoping this generates a few laughs and some good advice as well!

Just a warning, the first 15 years can be brutal! I’ve been married 15 years and still find ways to hunt. Best relief I’ve had is all my children coming of age so I can escape the house with them. Good luck bro!

 

[Rifleman86]

I was super nervous about this when I got married.

Bottom line have an open and frank conversation with your soon to be wife about what hunting means to you and how much time and money you expect to devote to it. In doing so you might have to sacrifice other activities you enjoy.

I’m currently deployed, with an 11 month old at home. I get home in May. I am still going on my Elk hunting trip this fall.

I’ll be honest; when I first floated the idea she wasn’t a happy camper, but after explaining to her what my yearly trek west meant to me, and that other than that I would be pretty much at her disposal otherwise, she was ok with it.

She knows what it means to me, it’s my one “thing” that I need to keep me happy. She gets it. On the other hand I’m not spending every other weekend golfing, watching football, going out with the boys, etc. I’d rather have my hunting trip than any of that crap.

 

[Rifleman86]

Double tap

 

[Lurch12]

Just be open with your wife. Let her do the things she wants and she will let you do the things you want. Marriage didn’t change much for me, but when the kids came along is when the hunting really decreased, and rightfully so. 2 kids in the house under 3 is a lot to take care of, plus we both work full time jobs. You gotta make time for the family but you also have to make time for yourself. And this my wife really understands. Now that my oldest is almost 2.5 he does all kinds of scouting with me, goes fishing, camping etc. I have also got my wife into hunting and fishing with me so she understands my addiction.

This year will be my first trip headi west since we got married. is she looking forward to it, no. But she understands why I want to go and plan to go every other year. But those 9 days I’m gone will be a lot of work for her taking care of the kids and still going to work everyday.

Marriage is great, and kids are even better. Best wishes to you and your wife!

 

[toadmeister]

Biggest Hangup my wife had was that jobs and responsibilities around the house needed to get done if I was to be away hunting. Wife worked 60 hours a week previously and couldn’t get it all done herself.

Got easier as kids got older and I take one of my kids with more often now. Wife is working about half what she was now too. So just make sure her honey to do list has been checked off and there’s food in the house now.


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[johndensmore24]

When my wife and I were still married, I would invite her to go hunting with me. She loved it and we had a great time. It's been a few years since our marriage broke down, but we're still on good terms. In many ways, this place https://breakupangels.com/stay-friends-after-divorce/ has helped us stay friends and I appreciate it. We still sometimes hunt deer together as it is very sunk in her soul, and it is also my favorite activity. We easily look at our past, as we both understand that we are all people, and feelings can not be ordered. So hunting with your ex-wife is fun.

 

[Rich M]

A lot of thing people don't understand about relationship.

.2 she doesn't have to know about what you spend on hunting and shooting, so as you are taking care of the bills you are supposed to.
.3 you don't check how many purses she has and you doesn't count how guns or ammo you have or buy on a regular.

Buddie you'll be fine.

I disagree here.

Had the "not gonna change this" discussion before marriage.... Hers and mine.

Everything is joint and agreed upon. Basically we talk about what we want before we get it.

Unless you have a prenup, she owns 50% of everything you do and vice versa.

If your wife isn't your best friend, you really are missing out.