Words I wish I could take back

[Swamp Fox]

Just last week I was at rona (canadian version of home depot) and I see a guy with no arms jumping up and down with his butt on his tonneau cover trying to get it closed. Well, I asked him if he needed a hand and he quickly replies "brother I could use two" we both had a good chuckle and I helped him get it closed. I should have felt sheepish but he was a good sport.

I've used the phrase "on his last leg" at least once, prolly twice, talking about someone else, with a long-distance hunting buddy who lost a leg at the knee in an ATV accident.

His reply, with a chuckle: "I'm on my last leg, too ..." --- That's the definition of a good ol' boy, and a gentleman.

 

[timmymac24]

Not me but one of my high school biology students answered a question about Edward Jenner and vaccinations and said Jenner used a pussy secretion to make his smallpox vaccine. Still one of the best in my 31 years in the classroom. I guess it should have been secretion from the pus….

 

[Swamp Fox]

Told a potential client "It's no skin off my nose" when she told me she might not come aboard because of x y or z ... She pitched a fit, and still didn't come aboard .... So, no skin off my nose.

Used the phrase "kill two birds with one stone" with another client. Inherited her after her husband divorced her. Apparently, she was an animal rights nut in addition to her other faults. Got an earful, learned my lesson.

 

[Swamp Fox]

Got my consonants and pleasure centers mixed up one time I was really excited to fling some arras ....

Told some folks in an office I serviced occasionally that I'd be gone to Texas and absolutely unreachable for a week or so, and so they asked, "Whatcha gonna do?"

And I said, "I'm goin' wild whore hunting...."
.
.
.

LTFAO, was everyone in the room ...

What I *meant* was I was going wild *boar* hunting, but "hog" and "boar" got a lil mixed up in my brain somehow.... LOL

Freudian?

 

[100percent]

Oh yeah, the first time I said "I do" was a colossal mistake.

Oh boy! Awards forthcoming!!! Nailed it on first reply!

 

[IDVortex]

Words I wish I could take back? I could write a book. But won't, in my young 32 years of life, one thing I've learned, words are just as dangerous and hurtful as actions. Always be cautious with both, and to lean on the side of humbleness.

 

[Greyinggrayling]

Years ago when I worked as a tech at a veterinary clinic, a dog got loose from its owner out back. I walked out to help, because the dog wouldn’t come to the owner or my boss. I knelt down and called “here girl” and she came right to me. I laughed and said loudly “she ain’t gonna do that again…”
I didn’t know the dog was there for euthanasia.
Edit to add: my boss thought it was hilarious

 

[Swamp Fox]

words are just as dangerous and hurtful as actions

Really?







Really?

 

[jayhawk]

“I do”

Edit: Dang somebody already beat me to this joke.

 

[grfox92]

Yep threw out the holy grail several days ago. Argument w the wife, first words out of my mouth were "your just like your mother" She got really quiet and asked me " what did you just say"? IT was at this moment I knew I messed up.....

How was the divorce?

Sent from my SM-G990U2 using Tapatalk

 

[grfox92]

Really?







Really?

No way he thought that one through.

Sent from my SM-G990U2 using Tapatalk

 

[Silveroddo]

Yep threw out the holy grail several days ago. Argument w the wife, first words out of my mouth were "your just like your mother" She got really quiet and asked me " what did you just say"? IT was at this moment I knew I messed up.....

My Brothers wife totaled her Jeep awhile ago and they replaced it with a half ton pickup because she got scared about stuff moving around in an accident with kids in car seats. My Brother was pretty particular with what they replaced it with so it wasn’t 100% her choice on the truck, so she throws jabs once in awhile and says “I wish I still had my Jeep”. To which he responds to her “Well, if you knew how to drive”