Mid life crisis career change… Remote jobs?

[FranklinBluth]

Basically in the same position as the OP, only a couple years older and in Minnesota. Wife and I have good paying jobs and live reasonably close to relatives, and as other parents of young kids can attest, that is no small thing. We also have a school district locally that we like quite a lot. But if you've seen any news out of MN, you can tell things have gone sideways and aren't getting better any time soon, which has prompted us to consider moving.

In the short term to gain a bit of flexibility I decided to go the self employed route. A couple years ago we bought a small (cheap) place in Alaska that allows me to stage gear and base trips out of (kids included!). Unfortunately my self employed work has zero remote options, so any time away that I spend in AK is unpaid. But as I tell my buddies, I don't have to ask the boss for time off to go to the cabin and go fishing or hunting. And it's hard to put a price on that kind of freedom. I'd definitely encourage anyone starting over career-wise to try and figure out how to make self employment work, particularly if you're re-locating to take advantage of hunting/fishing.

 

[downthepipe]

My recommendation: plan to leave exactly when you are vested in 3 years. Spend the next 3 years traveling around the west and figuring out the scenery you like the most. Fly into Boise or SLC or Reno and just drive around and do some adventure. By the 3 year mark you will have a better idea of where you want to live and also you and your wife will have had time to apply to the right jobs and hopefully move with a job already lined up. As far as what career - I think you’ll find public safety jobs in western Republican towns is pretty desirable.

 

[S.Clancy]

The dude flies helicopters.

I was talking about myself

 

[4090Sharps]

As far as what career - I think you’ll find public safety jobs in western Republican towns is pretty desirable.

Don't public service jobs tend to pay less in Republican-heavy locations? That's been my experience from living in a variety of locations in the east and west. Liberal states and locales, you give up freedoms and pay a little more in taxes in exchange for better infrastructure (quality schools, public services, roads, etc). More Republican places have poorer (quality and finaces) schools, underpaid public servants, but you get to keep more of your paycheck and can own guns that are more fun. My Republican-leaning town recently help shoot down a tax that would have helped fund rural firefighters and pay them better. Sad day for my firefighter BIL. All anecdotal, but something you should consider with your heavy focus on politics and pay with two careers in public service. Those two issues seem to clash given your civilian profession.

Cost of living in the west is hellacious (housing especially) when compared to places like OH, and infrastructure for remote work can be a limiting factor when choosing a home (I think you mentioned an interest in remote work). When I moved back out West with my east coast remote job, it was tough finding a home that checked all the boxes and had high speed internet--not that crap that satellite companies call high speed, but actual high speed.

Someone else mentioned family, and you mentioned the insane costs of daycare. Do you have local family in OH? Does your family help out with childcare? Babysitting? That's something to keep in mind, besides having to burn vacation time to visit the family you moved away from. You may find (depending on number of kids and age) that living close to family save you $10k or more a year.

I hope you can find a great fit and happiness for you and your family, with whatever adventure and path you take. Reading through here, there is a lot of solid advice and points for consideration. The idea of returning to active duty isn't a bad one among the mix either

 

[TheCougar]

You have a great resume. Opportunities in healthcare, aviation, and defense. Just realize that looking for a job you “love” is a trap. Liking your job is about as good as it gets; it is work, after all. No job is perfect and everything has its downsides. I left the military last year after flying fighters for 20 years straight. It was time to go, and I knew (and I was right) that I would never find a job that could replace the community, the challenge, and the adventure of what I was leaving. I eliminated what I didn’t want to do (being tied to email, sitting in a cubicle, answering to the Bobs) and looked at what was left. I picked the best job that enabled me to do the job I really love - being a husband and a father and help my wife homeschool the kids. I tell you this because I encourage you to look at your question from a different angle. The grass is always greener on the other side, and it’s a goose chase to find a job that gives you fulfillment or happiness. I find neither in my job, so I looked for a job that supports what gives me the fulfillment and happiness elsewhere - family, church, and maybe a little hunting. Good luck in your search. If you have questions on the airlines, hit me up. Cheers.

 

[Turkeygetpwnd38]

I’m in a similar enough situation and so far no decision has been my decision. The thing I struggle with daily is the fine line between the “be thankful for what you have, you are better off than most, man up, having security, the known” and “money isn’t everything, chase your dreams, only have one life/life is short, no regerts, the unknown”. The thread is full of both ideologies.
I think you’ll only know which was right in retrospect, no way to figure it out on the front end. I will say staying in a situation where you are miserable will eventually take a toll on your health, everything has a cost.
I wish you and your family the best though, I’m sure you’ll get it sorted.

 

[TheHammer]

Similar situation as OP. But I’ve been wanting to move to Wyoming for 15 years.. for reference when I first started looking in one of my favorite places, a decent little home on a 40 without HOA was 170k. That same house on .3acres in that area is now 650k. 4 years ago I had everything lined up to make it all happen. I had some life things happen and I regret everyday not following through with it especially with the current NR tag situation in states I want to hunt. None of us are getting younger. Time can’t be bought.

 

[mgreenspan]

Similar situation as OP. But I’ve been wanting to move to Wyoming for 15 years.. for reference when I first started looking in one of my favorite places, a decent little home on a 40 without HOA was 170k. That same house on .3acres in that area is now 650k. 4 years ago I had everything lined up to make it all happen. I had some life things happen and I regret everyday not following through with it especially with the current NR tag situation in states I want to hunt. None of us are getting younger. Time can’t be bought.

That’s the thing with land and houses. They are only cheaper yesterday. The crash that occurred wasn’t because people were buying up 40 acre plots away from humans and those values really aren’t ever coming back down.

 

[hunting1]

At 49 and burnt out from all the years as a PM I will say money is great but health and happiness should be everyone's goal. Thanks for your service, we have similar backgrounds and I wish I would have taken chances earlier. I hate what I do now and am looking for a change. My kids are all out so gives me more options.

Best of luck and oh yeah I was born and raised in Ohio so get that too.

 

[Sherman]

I run into guys out here in rural Colorado that are helicopter ambulatory pilots. They are all over the place.

 

[dutch_henry]

I hope Roksliders reading your thread pick up on the lessons you're sharing:

1. Put money away for the future.
2. You don't achieve your dreams by dreaming--you achieve them by hard ass work.
3. Sometimes you have to put your head down and slog--in which case you need to know your exit strategy so you stay sane.
4. Like it or not, work forges who you are. Life's a lot better if you're doing something you're proud of.
5. Do work that brings meaning to your life. But recognize nothing lasts forever and it's okay to change up careers when that meaning has eroded.
6. Life is a hell of a lot better with a great, supportive spouse who also wants the same things for your family.

I've worked in higher education for 20+ years. Talk about a field that's turned into a dead-end hellhole. For the last two years I've been taking classes to support a switch to nursing (ultimate goal of nurse practitioner). I've been blown away by the support I've received from my wife, Even though we'll take a sizable financial hit when I go back to school full time, she's been incredibly supportive of the endeavor.

Some great advice in this thread and inspiring for someone in my position. OP, thanks for starting it.

 

[BuckeyeRifleman]

You have a great resume. Opportunities in healthcare, aviation, and defense. Just realize that looking for a job you “love” is a trap. Liking your job is about as good as it gets; it is work, after all. No job is perfect and everything has its downsides. I left the military last year after flying fighters for 20 years straight. It was time to go, and I knew (and I was right) that I would never find a job that could replace the community, the challenge, and the adventure of what I was leaving. I eliminated what I didn’t want to do (being tied to email, sitting in a cubicle, answering to the Bobs) and looked at what was left. I picked the best job that enabled me to do the job I really love - being a husband and a father and help my wife homeschool the kids. I tell you this because I encourage you to look at your question from a different angle. The grass is always greener on the other side, and it’s a goose chase to find a job that gives you fulfillment or happiness. I find neither in my job, so I looked for a job that supports what gives me the fulfillment and happiness elsewhere - family, church, and maybe a little hunting. Good luck in your search. If you have questions on the airlines, hit me up. Cheers.

Thanks for chiming in @TheCougar

I know you mentioned transitioning to the airlines a while back and I was curious to get your input.

Take away ALL the outside factors and I wouldn’t mind flying for a living. I enjoy it, and I even enjoy the “boring” world of instrument flight. Factor in those outside factors, and it quickly can lose appeal.

Unfortunately with the route to flight school I took (Army) it would take some doing to transition to the fixed wing world. Not an impossible hurdle by any means, but not easy either. If I was in my 20s it would be a no brainer. Late 30s and with a family is a different ball game. Not to mention, I’d largely need to be tied to a big city, especially if I made it to a Major or Legacy. To live the places I’d want, that means commuting, and I’ve not heard great things about that life with a family.

All that being said, it’s not off the table. But I want to consider ALL the downsides to anything I do from this point forward.

When I got hired at the FD all I thought about were the up sides. Schedule that gives me lots of time off, good pay for what you do, good pension, exciting runs, etc. I figured if I did what I loved, it would never feel like work… Which was naive, but who isn’t at 24?

Nobody sat me down and explained all the negatives. Being tied to one location for a 25+ year career, a pension that doesn’t transfer, burnout, cancer rates, etc etc. Maybe they did, but I was too young and hard headed to listen. Same with the military and military aviation. Deployments, CTC rotations, etc.

But as to your point, I’ve come to the same conclusion. It’s ALL work. You sorta gotta do it, and it’s all gonna have some suck, no matter how cool it is on paper.

Similar to you, I’ve realized my priorities have changed as my life has transitioned. Living someplace I love, that affords me the opportunity to have great experiences with my family and spend time with them has transitioned to the top of my priority list. I’d even tolerate emailing the Bobs for a living if it afforded that… Because I’ve learned it beats dealing with the same drunk homeless guy you know by name at 0300.

Like most people I’ve always lived wherever my career happened to take me. For the majority of my life that’s been Ohio.

It’s not bad, there are far worse places on the map. But life is short, and I’m ready to experience something and someplace new. Most importantly my wife feels the same way.

 

[Howdy Partner]

IMHO have the wife quit and get the kids out of daycare.

She will someday resent the time NOT spent with them.

 

[North Idaho Stickbow]

Don't public service jobs tend to pay less in Republican-heavy locations? That's been my experience from living in a variety of locations in the east and west. Liberal states and locales, you give up freedoms and pay a little more in taxes in exchange for better infrastructure (quality schools, public services, roads, etc). More Republican places have poorer (quality and finaces) schools, underpaid public servants, but you get to keep more of your paycheck and can own guns that are more fun. My Republican-leaning town recently help shoot down a tax that would have helped fund rural firefighters and pay them better. Sad day for my firefighter BIL. All anecdotal, but something you should consider with your heavy focus on politics and pay with two careers in public service. Those two issues seem to clash given your civilian profession.

Cost of living in the west is hellacious (housing especially) when compared to places like OH, and infrastructure for remote work can be a limiting factor when choosing a home (I think you mentioned an interest in remote work). When I moved back out West with my east coast remote job, it was tough finding a home that checked all the boxes and had high speed internet--not that crap that satellite companies call high speed, but actual high speed.

It’s a trade off. I’ve been offered double what I make here across the border in Washington, but there’s no way hell I would ever be a cop there. They have no qualified immunity and they’ll throw you under the bus the first chance they get and the public hates you. That’s why they pay so much and can’t fill any positions.

As far as cost of living goes, you’re spot on. It’s gotten so insane here that it still blows my mind.

 

[mtnbiker208]

just stay where you are. Enough people have moved out west in the last couple of years.
the changes have been enormous.

 

[North Idaho Stickbow]

just stay where you are. Enough people have moved out west in the last couple of years.
the changes have been enormous.

My next stop is the Midwest seriously; as long as the opportunity presents itself.

 

[BuckeyeRifleman]

My next stop is the Midwest seriously; as long as the opportunity presents itself.

Trust me, I am very aware of the “grass is always greener” trap and I don’t want to fall for it.

But similarly I hear all the time bitching from long term residents about packed trail heads and ruined hunting/fishing/etc in the west.

Then I go out on hunts and have a great time, remark on how few people there are compared to out East, and still fill my tag on day one or two.

I think anywhere you live, it’s tough to see stuff change for the worse and still be appreciative of what you have. It’s just human nature.

 

[kfili]

I feel like I am a few steps ahead of you add will offer my advice- just remember its worth what you paid for it. I was in a pensioned position as well (teacher) and got out a few years ago. Overall Im glad I am out and would personally rather go flip burgers than back to education. I didn't have as many options as you so I sort of had to rob peter to pay paul in terms of my new career. Overall I am so glad I did, but still not sure if I am currently doing what I will do forever. The main thing to keep in mind is the unforseen downsides to the new job. It can be hard to really get a feel for what it will be like until you are dealing with the new challenges. I just recommend going on a bit of a listening tour with people in the role you think you will end up in and really try to take the blinders off and get a real feel for the new job.

 

[Jimbee]

It’s a trade off. I’ve been offered double what I make here across the border in Washington, but there’s no way hell I would ever be a cop there. They have no qualified immunity and they’ll throw you under the bus the first chance they get and the public hates you. That’s why they pay so much and can’t fill any positions.

As far as cost of living goes, you’re spot on. It’s gotten so insane here that it still blows my mind.

Just follow the laws and you don't have to worry.

 

[North Idaho Stickbow]

Just follow the laws and you don't have to worry.

If you’re implying me following the rules: that’s not an issue at all. If you mean folks doing dumb stuff following the laws; I wish.